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What are the Different Types of Conflict Resolution Skills?

Dan Cavallari
Dan Cavallari

Conflicts happen in interpersonal relationships as well as in workplace relationships; this is a normal part of life and should not necessarily be avoided. In order to deal with them effectively, however, one must develop conflict resolution skills, the most important of which is the ability to listen well. One must not only be able to listen well, but also listen actively; this means taking notes, asking clarifying questions, and summarizing to make sure an understanding has been reached. Active listening is first and foremost on the list of conflict resolution skills one must possess in order to diffuse conflicts and come to constructive conclusions.

It is easy to lose one's temper during an argument or conflict, but another one of the most important conflict resolution skills is the ability to remain calm. This will help diffuse any hostility between people having the conflict, and it will also help everyone to better understand the root causes of the conflict. It is too easy to let issues pile up and to stockpile arguments for the big conflict; one should avoid doing this, as it often takes the conflict to a personal level that can be hurtful to one or more parties involved.

Two employees work out differences in opinion using conflict resolution skills.
Two employees work out differences in opinion using conflict resolution skills.

Conflict resolution skills will help one better understand each side of the argument. It is important to recognize differing opinions and recognize them as valid concerns. This ensures that all parties involved feel validated and respected. From there, one must learn to discuss possible positive outcomes and promote compromise; no conflict can be fully resolved without each side of the argument making concessions, so it is important to lead each side down the path toward understanding by making them recognize concessions must be made.

The ability to remain calm is an important conflict resolution skill.
The ability to remain calm is an important conflict resolution skill.

Often, recognizing the root cause of a conflict is more important than solving the apparent problem. Conflict resolution skills include the ability to recognize when an argument stems from a deeper issue, as it so often does. Asking clarifying questions can help one find the root cause; simple questions such as "When did this all start?" and "Was your anger caused by something else?" can help everyone involved better understand how to come to a reasonable solution to the issues.

People who work with young children may need different conflict resolution skills.
People who work with young children may need different conflict resolution skills.

Sometimes the most useful of the conflict resolution skills is the most difficult to put into practice: letting go of the idea of punishment. When one feels wronged, he or she naturally feels as though the wrongdoer should be punished. In many situations, a conflict can be resolved more quickly and easily if all parties are willing to forget about punishment and work toward a constructive outcome. This is a difficult concept for many people, especially people who are angry and frustrated. When dealing with a conflict, developing an ability to forgive and forget will go a long way toward peaceful resolution.

Discussion Comments

burcinc

Everyone working in an office environment ought to have conflict resolution skills because conflicts in office environments are inevitable. I think the best quality to have while trying to resolve an office conflict is staying calm and not losing one's temper. When people become emotional about these conflicts or take them very personally, it tends to get out of control altogether. Remaining calm to get to the bottom of the issue and arranging a civil, respectful communication between people is necessary. It's easier said than done, but this is a situation where people have no choice but to see one another every day. So the more quickly it is resolved the better. Otherwise, the conflict will upset work as well.

ysmina

@turquoise-- Yes, I think so. If you are good at resolving conflicts between individuals, then of course, you can resolve conflicts between groups as well.

The only difference with international conflict resolution is that it's usually carried out by a third party that is not part of the conflict. So it's actually easier because conflict resolution requires being impartial. That can be difficult when the conflict is between yourself and someone else. It's difficult to empathize with the other person and to be open to the idea that you yourself may be wrong. This is the biggest challenge when it comes to conflict resolution where the individual is directly involved.

In third party conflict resolution and negotiation, it's easier to empathize with both parties and remain impartial. And since the negotiator doesn't belong to either group, the parties are more likely to trust him or her. Gaining trust and acting for the benefit of all are invaluable in conflict resolution.

turquoise

Are interpersonal conflict resolution skills and international conflict resolution skills the same?

I'm interested in a career in international conflict resolution or diplomacy in the future. I think I am relatively good at interpersonal conflict resolution, when an issue occurs between a family member and I. I just don't know if the same skills will be applicable on an international platform, between groups and cultures.

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      Two employees work out differences in opinion using conflict resolution skills.
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