How do I Overcome a Fear of Falling in Love?

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  • Written By: Jacob Queen
  • Edited By: Lauren Fritsky
  • Last Modified Date: 19 December 2019
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Usually the best way to overcome fear of falling in love is to get some kind of therapy. You probably have a deep subconscious belief that is holding you back, and you may not be able to correct this problem without some professional assistance. A therapist will help you analyze your previous life experiences and figure out exactly what is causing your fear of falling in love. Once you have that understanding, you can implement techniques and mental exercises that can help you redefine love and see things differently.

The fear of falling in love is a relatively common phobia. People who suffer with this fear will often avoid any kind of interaction with other people as a way to destroy the possibility of a love connection. Some of these people are terrified of the way love makes them feel, while others are more afraid of the consequences of love. The fear of falling in love is often caused by former relationships that leave a person scarred.


In many cases, fear of falling in love comes from an untrue belief system. The person may believe that all relationships end badly, or she may believe that love means that someone else is gaining control of her life. Correcting these kinds of false beliefs can sometimes require new personal experiences that defy your old ones and help you redefine what love means. In order to have those experiences, you’ll probably have to get past your fear enough that you can go out and meet some new people.

One unfortunate aspect of the fear of falling in love is what it does to people’s lives. They may purposefully sabotage relationships or limit their levels of intimacy with others. Many people who have this fear might try to keep all their romantic relationships on a physical level only, which can be off-putting to potential partners.

In some cases, dealing with a fear of falling in love may require full-on couples' therapy. If you’re already in a relationship when you discover you have this fear, it can be important to let your partner know, and then you can both go to therapy together. Discovering that your partner has this fear can be a painful experience, and your partner may worry that there is no way to repair the relationship. It’s also generally true that dealing with this fear can be easier if your romantic partner helps out.

Sometimes doctors prescribe drugs to help with fear of falling in love. Anti-anxiety pills and anti-depressants may both be prescribed depending on the situation. A person taking these drugs may have an easier time going out to meet people or dealing with the difficulties the fear is creating in his life. These benefits would be the main purpose of drug therapy with this kind of fear.


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Post 1

I remember being really scared to fall in love when I was in my early 20s or so. When I was a teenager, I would "fall in love" at the drop of a hat, but those relationships rarely lasted more than a few months. A few break-ups were so bad I thought I'd never put myself through that again. Nobody was worth that kind of emotional pain if the relationship didn't work out.

Until I read this article, I didn't really make the connection between a fear of falling in love and actual sabotage of a relationship. Thinking back on it now, I was probably in a few relationships that might have actually lasted if I hadn't suddenly turned

into a jerk. Things would be going well for a while and then I'd pick a fight just to get a reaction from my girlfriend. It really didn't matter if she took the bait or not. I wanted her to get mad enough at me to decide to end the relationship herself. That's not a good way to do things, but for people who are truly afraid to fall in love, manipulating the other person into a break-up is a common practice.

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