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How can I get a Restraining Order Against Someone?

Michael Pollick
Michael Pollick
Michael Pollick
Michael Pollick

The actual process of obtaining a restraining order can vary significantly from jurisdiction to jurisdiction, but there are some common rules and procedures to follow. There are essentially two different schools of thought when it comes to the nature and scope of a typical restraining order. One is considered protection against harassment, while the other is considered an order of protection. The differences between the two can be confusing, so many experts suggest consulting with a legal advocate before seeking a restraining order.

If you believe you are in imminent danger of bodily harm from someone you know, the first step may be to call 911 or whatever your local law enforcement emergency number is. The responding officer can guide you through the process of obtaining a restraining order, although there may be a lapse in time before the order can be legally enforced. If you can get yourself to a domestic violence shelter, an advocate there should also know the proper procedure for obtaining the order.

A restraining order could be issued in cases of domestic abuse.
A restraining order could be issued in cases of domestic abuse.

In general, obtaining a temporary restraining order begins with filing a claim at a local courthouse. The court clerk should give you some forms to fill out, which basically provides the court with your complete identification, contact information, and a detailed report of the incident(s) which prompted you to take action. The clerk may also ask for any corroborating evidence of harassment, threats or bodily harm. You'll want to bring photographs of injuries, copies of threatening communications or official incident reports. Be sure to provide as much contact information on the offender as you can.

If a judge is convinced a restraining order is of immediate need, they can order a temporary issue of restraint.
If a judge is convinced a restraining order is of immediate need, they can order a temporary issue of restraint.

Once you have filled out the required forms and provided evidence to the clerk, a judge will consider your petition for a restraining order as soon as his or her schedule allows. If the judge is convinced that a restraining order is required immediately, he or she will issue a temporary order of restraint called an ex parte restraining order. This type of order is generally valid for a short period of time, generally about two weeks or so. The court should provide a hearing date in which the temporary restraining order could be extended for as long as two years, depending on local laws.

A restraining order may prohibit phone calls between two people.
A restraining order may prohibit phone calls between two people.

Obtaining a restraining order from a judge is only the beginning of the process. A marshal or an authorized deputy must present a copy of the order to the offender before the terms can be legally enforced. If the offender should return before the order is properly served, the order could be considered invalid. Quite often, however, law enforcement officers will be waiting at the complainant's home to serve the order. Otherwise, the marshal will deliver the order to the contact address listed on the forms. The complainant will be contacted once the order has been properly served.

If you feel like you're in imminent danger, it's best to call 911.
If you feel like you're in imminent danger, it's best to call 911.

A restraining order is actually a legal matter between the judge and the offender, not between the two parties themselves. If the offender violates the terms of the order, even in the slightest way, the complainant has the right to call for legal protection. Typically, the offender is prohibited from communicating with the complainant or appearing within a specified distance of the complainant's home or workplace. If you have other family members who may also feel threatened by the offender, you may need to pursue a separate restraining order for each of them.

Michael Pollick
Michael Pollick

A regular WiseGEEK contributor, Michael enjoys doing research in order to satisfy his wide-ranging curiosity about a variety of arcane topics. Before becoming a professional writer, Michael worked as an English tutor, poet, voice-over artist, and DJ.

Learn more...
Michael Pollick
Michael Pollick

A regular WiseGEEK contributor, Michael enjoys doing research in order to satisfy his wide-ranging curiosity about a variety of arcane topics. Before becoming a professional writer, Michael worked as an English tutor, poet, voice-over artist, and DJ.

Learn more...

Discussion Comments

anon964803

My name is Jeffery and I am very upset. My oldest brother has been a violent bully since my first memories of him. The guy has a record of assaulting people, including two of my Mom's brothers years ago (he did prison time for that crime).

Long story short, he has loud-mouthed and physically bullied his way through life whenever possible. Recently, I had to threaten to call the authorities if he did not leave my residence when he had stopped by and flew into a rage for no good reason. He came in and within just a few minutes, he started issuing threats of great bodily harm to me. This certainly is not the first time my brother has done this to me or to others as well throughout the years. He is a lunatic and has stalked people before, such as one of his ex-girlfriends.

I am a peaceful person who just wants to enjoy life as much as I can without being forced to put up with threats and having my home invaded by a violent thug. I personally have no record of violence or crime other than a seatbelt violation. Currently I am thinking about taking out an order of protection against him. My Mom is against it because he likely will use the situation as leverage to prevent her from seeing her grandchildren since she lives with me. They are both good kids.

This has me in a difficult situation. Do I get the restraining order? I know that I truly should, but I don't want to punish my Mom or my nephews because my brother is a psychopath.

anon946341

I have now been threatened twice over the course of six months (first in September, no police call, and this month with a police call). The police failed to help. They only blame me on a loosely translated "on the verge of trespass" despite my neighbor communicating threats to me through her closed door. Then today, she acted as if my being on the sidewalk in a common area was a crime and nearly bolted out her door towards me, but my mouth kept her away.

Forget the police, but I do have a written record of an incident from a couple weeks ago. I feel threatened by her and if this keeps up, I am considering a restraining order to stop the harassment. Is this a fair assessment?

anon930468

I've been with this guy for almost a year. His mom is nuts. She tries to get in our lives every time she can. He would sneak around behind their backs to come see me, but in the end, it seems that the person he was lying to was me, since he wouldn’t work and would supposedly tell his dad he was with me, but his dad said he didn’t even knew where he was and that he thought we had broken up.

This gets to me all the time. His mom said he was dating another girl and every time I wanted to break up with him he would treat me bad and pushed me violently, but he doesn’t see it like that. We recently broke up and he still doesn’t leave me alone. What can I do?

anon346042

They will break into your home like they did to me, beat you and threaten your life. No paper can stop them.

anon343601

The lady who lives next door won't stop harassing me and our dogs. She gets them barking and then turns us into the spca for the barking. When we are outside, she is out there watching us, no matter what the time of the day or night is. Can I do anything legally to her?

anon343564

Restraining orders are just a piece of paper that won't put a stop to most cases of anything like abuse or harassment in any form. Most of the time, law enforcement picks a side and justice never gets served.

anon337901

Anon yes you can but it is a big pain. The person who you put the restraining order on will either have to move or stay in different classes.

usmle

My neighbor is going through a divorce. His wife called my husband and my boss at work and said that I am going out with him. Can I file a harassment restraining order against her?

amypollick

@anon315206: O.K. First thing is to call the cops and get the guy out of his workplace. The manager can sign a no trespass order so if the creep shows up anywhere close to the place of business, even if he's just whistling on the sidewalk, he can be arrested.

Second, your friend will have to get the restraining order. You can go with him and give him moral support, but he has to get the order. That usually involves going to city hall to get the order, but you can call the city clerk to find out.

Next, your friend needs to contact the service provider for his cell phone, and get his cell number changed. He should not give it to anyone who might give it to the creep. He should also check into getting a block on text messages and calls from particular numbers. Some providers offer this service.

The last thing I would do after getting my number changed is to take a couple days off work and disappear for a while. I'd leave town and go stay in a hotel room for a couple of days, and only tell my mom where I was.

One other thing: if your friend lives in an apartment or condominium, he needs to call the complex manager to get a no trespass order on the creep there, too, so he can't come on the premises where your friend lives. If he lives in a house, he can get a no trespass order on the house.

anon315206

I need an immediate reply here as quickly from someone who knows these ropes better than I. My friend recently found out that back in November that his best friend tried several times to sexually assault him. He didn't remember the incident because he was so intoxicated he was vomiting into a blanket at the time.

I instructed him along with others that this guy, even though they have been friends for eight years, was a bad limb that needed to be removed from his life. After completely cutting him out of his life, this guy has been calling time and time again, sending him consistent messages, including some harassing ones in which he uses foul terms and demeaning language. Tonight, the guy came into his place of work and has been there at least two hours sending him texts saying "I am not leaving until you talk to me," and calling the office number repetitively. My friend is starting to become truly scared at this point.

I want to help him get a restraining order because in the past this guy has gotten stupidly violent over the smallest things. Please, I desperately need advice on this.

anon312935

My child's father passed away. His widow has a long history of emotionally abusing my young child. She claims that I am evil and soulless. After his passing, she really went nuts. She tried to get visitation, but the courts denied it.

Now we live in fear. She said that God will reunite her and my child, maybe in five weeks, maybe five years. I have this on video. She found out where we live. Do I have grounds for an order of protection?

anon306765

Please help! My mom had a tenant who was supposed to live in and do some construction work for us. He was good with us for a month or so, but then he started asking for money. He first asked for money because he needed to get stuff out of storage or something. My mom gave him 200 bucks and he brought most of his belongings and put them in the garage and in the living/dining room which was not a part of the lease; it was just to help out a 70 year old with a heart problem.

The second time was because he had some stuff that was stopped at the border and he couldn't get it through without paying them. My mom generously gave him another $200-$300. The third time, he needed money my mom refused because she heard him talking on the phone with some people who he sends money to because they told him that they will double/triple his money.

That's when things started to go downhill. He would demand money for construction work he was doing without finishing the job, or after finishing saying he had to be paid extra for extra work he had to do. My mom told him he would be paid when the work was done. That's when he stopped paying rent, which was coming from welfare. He would take the rent and just send it to the guys who are supposed to double his money. He started yelling and screaming at my mom whenever she tried to talk to him. He was supposed to only stay a month, finish the work and move out. This dragged on for eight months. He was calling the police on us because we were disturbing him. He had the TV on loud, and was destroying the property, taking off the bathroom faucets and shower faucets, as well as drilling holes in the wall and spilling paint on the carpets, and flattening our tires. He would wake up in the middle of the night, like at 2 or 3 o'clock even, and just walk around downstairs in the kitchen. We had to stay up all night to see what he was up to.

We were mentally and physically worn out. He was purposely making our lives a living hell. We tried getting rid of him by calling the police (seven or eight times), which was no good. They would just say sorry, it's a tenant-landlord issue, not taking it seriously at all, even when we told them he was making death threats and saying things like, “When I am done with you, you won't even have a house to live in,” and that we shouldn't bother with going to the tenant-landlord board because he's played this game before and were going to lose. We decided to do so anyway, and when he found out what we were planning, he filed an application before us, claiming we violated his privacy by going in his room without permission and that we don't let him watch his TV and that we are harassing him by calling the cops and that we abuse him (unbelievable) so we had to go to the hearing.

We didn't do too well because my mom's English isn't good, so she couldn't explain properly and the judge didn't let me and my sister speak. He also said that my mom was not living in the house, that she is pretending, and since he was stealing our mail and my mom had the mail redirected somewhere else she couldn't give the proof that she was. We lost that case, but the judge was nice enough to tell us to file an application against him for rent and other things so that she would listen to both sides.

The second hearing was a month away and he continued with his antics. He also got the other tenant on his side, so we had two tenants not paying rent and living for free in our house. The old man started calling the city people and the fire department and electric department, saying we didn't have proper wiring and no smoke detectors and there was illegal construction going on, etc., none of which was true, but that didn't stop him from tearing down the smoke alarms every time we put them up.

The second court date went in our favor. We finally got the notice for him to leave by the end of November and to pay whatever he owes. This ticked him off. He started destroying more property and told us he would move on his own terms. We even tried to talk to him politely to keep things civil, but of course not. He just had to say pay me the money for the work I did (which was crappy and unfinished), so now he is shaking his stuff out in suitcases.

He goes once early in the morning when he thinks were asleep and then in afternoon when he thinks we've gone out somewhere (which we don't and thanks to that, I don't really have much of a social life and have insomnia). We wanted to know if he was finally moving and if he was, why he was doing it so secretly. We followed him one day to find out he was moving five houses down! (we live in a cul de sac townhouse – about 20 houses in total) I have feeling he plans to make us think he is not moving out by occasionally staying in his room even after the end of the month, even though he has a place, and harass us even more.

He was supposed to move out on the last day of November, but he is still here. He goes out for a really long amount of time, then comes back in the night. My sister thinks he wants us to waste money on calling the sheriff. Once he knows the chief has given the two weeks notice, he'll move out at the last minute and have the sheriff toss all his things outside from where he can pick up his stuff.

Can we get a restraining order to make sure he doesn't move close to us? Or should we go to the house he is moving into and tell the landlord (will they even believe us) we had to suffer eight months of this torture? Does anyone know what we can do? We've reached our limit.

amypollick

@ohio27: You might move somewhere else by 2020. That's eight years down the road. Your father will also have to register as a sex offender, so you will be able to keep track of his whereabouts and plan accordingly.

Having said that, until he gets out of jail, I don't know that you can get a restraining order on him. However, if he sends you any letters or anything from jail, mark them "Addressee unknown. Return to sender" and put them back in the mailbox.

Sometime between now and 2020, make sure your phone number is changed and is unlisted *and* unpublished. That means he can't get it through directory assistance. Don't give your cell number out to anyone except close friends and family members who will not give it to anyone else.

If anyone in your family besides your grandmother has any contact with him and is trustworthy, make sure they tell him that you desire no contact with him now or when he is released.

Also, contact the Rape, Abuse and Incest National Network. They have resources to help you. If you have not received any counseling, I recommend it. You're carrying a huge amount of emotional pain and therapy can help you. There are numerous support groups for survivors of sexual abuse and incest and I urge you to contact them, if you haven't already. They can help you deal with your pain and fear. Good luck.

ohio27

I have not had any contact with my father since mid 2006. He is a registered pedophile and currently incarcerated for his crime against a family member of mine. He molested me as a child along with seven of my cousins earlier in life.(I was three.) He was given probation for five years for that crime (only against my cousins, not me). Charges against him on me were never brought up.

In 2006, he was incarcerated for molesting a different family member. His earlier crimes against different family members were expunged from his record. He gets out in 2020, but I have a 2 year old now and do not want him to contact me at all. He has tried through my grandmother.

I want to know if I can get a restraining order against him, even though he has not threatened me but has tried to contact of me. My grandmother sent him a picture of me and my daughter. I did not find out about this until after the fact. I don't want him knowing anything about me or my daughter, and I fear that when he gets out, he might try to track me down, which isn't hard to do since you can find anyone's address on the internet for free or a low cost.

Can I legally get an order of protection to keep him from contacting me or coming to my neighborhood? I moved four hours away to try and prevent contact, but am scared it will not work. What can I do?

kp1832000

A girl whom I met about a month ago has started stalking me. She hangs out at the bar I frequent, waiting for me pretty much every weekend.

The last time I was there, she had her friend with her who threatened to kill me and all my friends. When confronted by my friends at the bar, she falsely accused me of rape and beating her before she recanted that same night.

She keeps saying, "Tell him I don't ever want to talk to him again," but I never reach out to contact her or even reply to her messages and phone calls. The late night phone calls never stop, and she even comes to my apartment at night sometimes and rings the doorbell over and over. I just sit in my apartment quietly.

I am interested in getting a restraining order but I am in Korea and I understand that restraining orders are not as common here or easy to get. I'm not sure what to do. I just want her to leave me alone. Do you think she will eventually give up?

uvray

I am a 27 year old female from Ohio. I met a person sometime last year. I liked him fine but gradually found he has lot of anger issues. I specifically asked him not to interfere in my professional life. But a month after I stopped talking to him, he started calling at my office number. He even came to my office even when I asked him not to. He also came to my home.

I met him in person and told him I do not appreciate him coming to my office or home or calling me, but he does not seem to listen. I am going to tell him firmly not to try and contact me in any way again. I am very very scared about what he will do when he hears that.

anon256963

I'm a stripper and I have been verbally harassed and threatened at work by another stripper. It has been going on for about three weeks and my boss hasn't done anything even though I have written and verbal complaints. Other employees have been complaining about her also. So far, our employer has done nothing to make her stop. What can I do?

anon251661

I feel so stupid right now. Two years ago, I finally had the guts to call the police on my abusive ex. We were having some problems and he, of course, overreacted out of jealousy and I was so scared that when he left the house in the middle of the night, I armed myself with a hammer and two telephones under the blanket next to me.

When he got home, he was trying to get me to leave our home and as soon as he touched me, I swung the hammer and reached for the phone and called 911. Not only was he arrested and served time in jail, he was deported. I cried so much the first few months, busted arm and all, but eventually, I picked myself up and started to get my life together.

I went back to school, graduated and promised our four kids we would come out of this on top. But the moment that he was with his mother in his birth country, he found away to reach out to me and of course, I stupidly gave in. He is still outside of the USA, but as soon as he realized I was only helping him so he could be in the kids' lives, he asked for a divorce and began threatening me, and saying he wished he had killed me in one of his earlier attacks on me years ago. He has said he was only trying to get back with me so he could kill me. I changed my number but he has my home address and now I don't know what to do. He threatens to have the kids either killed or kidnapped in order to get back at me. He blames me for not loving him and calling the police on him, and says I lied about everything just so I could cheat on him.

I can't help but love this monster, but now I am scared for my children's lives and I have no one to blame but myself. How can I stop his threats from coming true?

anon250124

My husband and I been married for more than 10 years. We have four wonderful kids. He has physically abused me three times during the time we were together. I moved out of our house because I was afraid he would hurt me again.

I have my own place to live, but since I can't afford the rent on my own, I have roommates with me. He does not approve of my roommates and wants me to find a place that I can afford on my own. I can't even have our kids with me for that reason.

I used to give him cash because he said that it is my obligation to pay him (more than half my paycheck). Aside from that, every time I come see and be with our kids (at our house/his now), there is always something I have to buy (if it's for our kids, I don't mind).

He has called me nasty names and thinks I'm doing drugs, getting drunk and dating around, to put it nicely. I have been tip-toeing around him for almost two years now. I have been obeying his rules about when to see our kids and what I can't do with our kids. He doesn't like any of my friends though they have not done him wrong. He threatens my roommates.

A few months ago I lost my job. Now I don't have any money to give him and he wants me to leave my place, and go back in the house with him and the kids. He has tried to force himself to me but I was able to say no, stop and if you don't I'll scream. Now he thinks something nasty is going on with me and a roommate. Because of that, he ordered me to stay away and not to see our kids.

He is a good father just short-tempered and controlling. I know he loves our kids and that is why I never filed any order against him. I know it will destroy him if I take away the kids from him but I also have sacrificed and suffered enough. All I want is what is best for our little ones.

anon250086

This is not a good post. One does not have to be under the threat of bodily harm to get a restraining order. Sometimes, a person can emotionally harm another, and there are many ways a person can do this.

The thing is that they repeatedly do it and despite multiple requests to discontinue they will continue. Domestic violence is an obvious situation, but emotional abuse is a very serious issue here. This article completely dismisses such things.

anon242469

@anon153664, Post 188: Your best bet by law experience is to just ignore her. It appears there might be more to this story and she just might turn around and throw something (legal) right back at you which you might regret. The courts tend to side with the elderly and it does not matter what type of a position you might hold in this country. I suggest you guys just leave her alone. --43 years experience.

anon234598

Very confusing story about to take place. My daughter's father, whom I never married, recently got a divorce from wife #2. He and I were together between wife #1 and wife #2. Since he has gotten his divorce, his now ex wife (#2) has left me a very threatening voice mail, claiming she was going to bury under the ground that her children walk on. My daughter's father and this woman are trying to work things out, so is there anything I can do legally to keep this psycho away from my daughter? A restraining order or something?

amypollick

@jlilia08: Since any U.S. military base is, technically, U.S. soil, you might be able to file an order. I don't know.

However, as an active member of the military, you do have access to legal aid. I'm not necessarily saying you need to file charges, but someone in the JAG office should be able to tell you what your options are, in confidence.

Having said that, if he is threatening to find you when he gets back stateside, you do not need to give him the opportunity.

If he is doing this to you, assuming he finds someone else, then when that relationship ends, he will harass that person. This is going to end up with someone getting hurt. I know since he is in England, the threat is distant, but there are a lot of potential victims for him wherever he goes.

If he is actively harassing you, he needs to be stopped. It may not escalate to the level of ruining his career, especially if a stern warning from his CO stops the foolishness, but it still doesn't necessarily protect you when he comes back to the U.S. Do you want this guy following you and sitting outside your house at night, waiting for you?

Unless he is stopped, chances are, he's not going to stop voluntarily. As difficult as it is, you probably are going to need to take legal action to protect yourself.

jlilia08

My ex-fiance and I are both active duty military. He is now stationed in England and I am still stateside. I ended our relationship six months ago and he still harasses me nearly every day through e-mail, calling my work and trying to find things out from my friends.

I know I can take this up through our legal office on base, but as much as I don't want him contacting me, I don't want to ruin his career either. My question right now is: can I file a harassment restraining order/no contact order against him even though he is in the UK? He's also said that he would come see me back here stateside. I would just like to know what my chances are in filing without repercussions as well.

somya

My daughter ran away with her boyfriend, and i want to get legally get rid of her. I am afraid that she can blame us for any harm. Please suggest a legal action for this.

anon195499

I broke off a relationship about two months ago with my boyfriend. Under the impression he wanted to be friends, I spoke to him for about a month. He began showing up at my residence randomly, now on two separate incidents, and threatened one of the occupants if he was not allowed to speak to me in private. Can I get a restraining order against him?

anon184629

Can you get a restraining order against someone in another country?

anon179057

Please help! Two years ago I was sleeping with this man. I did not find out until a few weeks later that he was married. Once I found out, I cut him off and cut off all communication.

Fast forward to today and I get a phone call from his wife saying she found the e-mails from two years ago between me and her husband (I am assuming that he never cleans his e-mails and he didn't delete my number). Now she is calling non stop and sending threatening text messages and e-mails. I am happily married now, but my husband is severely ill and I don't want to deal with her.

I feel really bad for what happened, but I had no idea she existed. Regardless, I feel like I am being harassed and I want to know if the emails, phone calls and texts are enough for the restraining order.

anon178897

I recently had an affair with a man but broke it off around a month ago. Since then, he has been following me everywhere. Can I get a restraining order on him?

anon177690

I am being verbally abused by a girl in my class and recently she has punched me. can i get a restraining order against her and if so what will happen because we see each other all the time because we have the same friendship group?

anon174651

I have an 18 year old daughter who has a friend I totally dislike. I have younger kids who don't need to be exposed to drugs/alcohol, etc. just yet. I know they'll be exposed eventually, but why now?

Anyhow, I have banned this girl from my house for the sake of my sanity and my younger children's innocence.

Although my daughter is to blame as well, i have vocally told this girl she's not welcome on my property, let alone my house. But, she's here day after day. And yes, my daughter is partially to blame by allowing it. It's hard to explain.

What can I do to ensure she doesn't even come close to my house, let alone in it?

anon173940

My neighbor harassed me about moving things out of the way so they could move, and have consistently been demanding that I not put things out on the patio.

Now they have lied to a bunch of their friends, and called the cops because I moved my things back, and said I threatened to kill her. They formed an angry mob. What can I do to protect myself?

anon173880

I am wondering if an actress living mainly in another country can get a restraining order on me for posting obsessive comments about her on the internet.

amypollick

@anon173313: If your mom doesn't know about this, then tell her! She needs to know. If she isn't listening, is there a teacher or counselor you can talk to? An adult who will stand up for you needs to know about this. He has no business touching you in *any* way.

You really need to tell someone this is going on, or this pervert is going to start trying to take your clothes off. If he hasn't already.

Please, please, tell an adult you trust what is going on here. You need someone to stand up for you. This is abuse.

anon173313

I'm 14 and I live with my mom and my sister. a few months ago, a few army dudes my mom knows started to live at my house. One of them bought me a bike recently (the only thing he has ever done for me) and today he got mad at me and spray panted it and now it literally went from being worth $450 to about $50$.

I really tried to keep that bike in good condition and put my own labor into keeping it nice because I have not had a bike for about five years. He also literally sits and lays on me. Even if I tell him I can't breathe.

It's even gotten to the point that I ran away and walked until about 1 in the morning. Please, can I get a restraining order? (By the way, only one of the dudes did all of this.)

anon166581

i have recently broken up with my partner whom i have two daughters with and as a child, the mother was sexually abused by her father. She told her mum. etc., and her sister was also abused. Nothing was done until we got together and i supported her through having him charged, etc. and her family turned on her.

But now that have we broken up, she has gotten back in contact with her mum and sister, etc., and I'm worried about the welfare of my daughters as i don't want them around the sister and my ex's mum. If she can let this happen to her own daughter and not care, i fear for my daughter's safety.

There is a police report my ex filled out regarding her father when he was charged, but what i want to know is can i get a restraining order preventing the sister and mother from being around my daughters as my ex won't listen to me in this matter.

loreine

My son is seven years old and there is a mom who is always over him telling him what to do, grabbing him and complaining to the teacher about things that are not happening.

I talked to his two teachers and they said that my son is not a bully as this woman called him. Because of all the accusations against a little boy, he is scared of her and doesn't want to go to school anymore.

I went to talk to this woman and asked her to stay away from my child because she has no right to threaten him because he is a minor and she always can talk to me first, but she said that she is not going to stop because my son is a bully (is not true).

This woman is always in other people's business and she has no intention of leaving us alone! What can I do? Can I get an order against her?

anon166212

My wife got seduced by an internet predator and has entered into a two or three year sneaky love affair resulting in our upcoming divorce.

Any man who sneaks around romancing another man's wife is clearly a weasel. I want to keep my three kids away from this creep but the wife and I share custody one week on and one week off. What rights do I have with respect to the company of the kids when the kids are with their mom? I can chose who my kids can be around, right? Can I get something that would protect my kids from this trash?

anon163528

just wanted to know if saying good morning to ex on train considered harassment. we've had arguments in the past, but I've moved on and now i just say good morning, smile and keep it moving.

anon163209

i live with my sister who is four years older than me and she threatens to kill me and harm me and actually does hurt me, but my parents just think that's how all siblings act. Can i get a restraining order against her?

anon158812

@anon154081: You are not being harassed. Harassment is an action that a reasonable person would see as threatening.

Have you asked the guy to leave you alone? It's a two way street. You need to be reasonable too.

He is just saying hi to you, you said people in your group suffer mental health problems. Is paranoia one of them? It seems you believe he is following you because you see him a lot, despite the fact he lives by you and goes to the same group. Could he not say the same thing about you?

anon158561

Lots of people at school have been picking on me and it keeps getting worse and worse. They do everything in their power to harass me and to get a reaction out of me. They threaten to beat me up, punch me, etc. They flirt with my boyfriend to try and get a reaction out of me. They say stuff about me as i walk by. I don't know what to do. This isn't even the whole story but I don't have enough time to put it on here.

inneed

will a restraining order get my live in girlfriend out of my house? we have a 3 year old child that I'm in fear for because of the heavy doses of medication she is taking. she lies, steals and is very threatening to me. i want her out but she won't leave and everyone says too bad. this is my house, not hers. what do i do?

anon154081

I am 43, and sometimes attend a group that include some folks with some mental illnesses. I am being pursued by a guy that has schizophrenia. So far, I've been chased around town by him "popping up and saying "hi" and my name every time. I was walking home from shopping, I live in an apt. building and he is one of the residents. He must've been looking out his window because than he showed up in front of me to offer help with my bags. When I got on the bus, there he was, when I got off the bus, there he was "getting in my face" saying "Hi! Hi! Hi!"

This is very annoying. I don't even like him in that way. He's obsessed, or he's acting obsessed! I've been staying away from that group because of chronic pain more than anything else. I cringe when he waves at me. I don't wave back, I don't like the way he follows me in the building I attend the group in.

I went to the restroom one day there and there he was, "waiting" in the hallway. One day I was walking to the room in the winding hallway and he popped out from behind a corner and said hi. He stares at me like he's in a trance, and he used to show up to the group when he wasn't supposed to be there. He didn't attend the group on Fridays, but because I'm there on Fridays, he is now there. Someone told me that he's in love, but that is not what I think at all. I think he's obsessed.

One time I didn't respond to his "hi --!" [long name] and he said..."OK, be that way then!"

should I go to the police yet? He hasn't physically harmed me but he harasses me by making kissing sounds and fallowing me. Help me please.

smrlover21

i am 24 and i have a son. his baby's mother harasses me all the time and she's tried to hurt me twice. i am a very respectful man and i don't want to put my hands on her but i am scared i will. i wonder can i put a restriction order against her and still see my son.

anon153664

I am wondering if I can get a restraining order against a neighbor who stands and just stares and watches every little move people make, including when you get into your car. She just stares and watches and then moves her mouth when you back out of the driveway and even went as far as making a line down the driveway so you don't cross over onto her driveway. She is an elderly woman who I think needs some serious help, but she wins people over very easily.

amypollick

@anon152904: You can certainly ask for a restraining order. Whether you get one or not is up to the legal eagles, but you can always ask for one.

A restraining order covers the *person.* That is, a restraining order covers you, no matter where you are, whether you are in your house, at a bus stop, or in a restaurant.

You may be thinking about a "no trespass" order. Those are pegged to a particular location, and may have to be taken out by the owner of the property. Nevertheless, if you have a restraining order taken out against them, your mom can say whatever she wants, but if you are home, no matter who owns the house, they can't come within a certain distance of you. Good luck.

anon152904

how do I get a restraining order on my sister and her boyfriend? they come to my house every day and are not nice to me and they harass me.

My mom owns the house and says they can come, even though they put me down and say nasty things to me every day.

I don't want them to come but i don't own the house but I lived here for years and years and they don't live here.

even though I don't own the house, can i still file for a restraining order even though my mom says they come and she owns the house.

It's really bad. They argue with me every time they come and that's every day. anyone?

anon146272

I'm a sophomore in college right now. Last year I made the mistake of meeting a guy online. I had done it before and they were all great meetings. The guys were nice and all I was looking for was someone to hangout with and talk to. (I even talked to girls, not just guys.)

Unfortunately, the last guy I chose to meet said he had been in the army and he would really like to meet me. He sent me pictures (so I knew he was real) and we planned to meet. I decided my college was the best place because it was public. When the guy came, he was 45! He got me up to my room and started undressing me. I was scared for my life.

Moral of the story: I got him out of my room, but not before he took pictures. Now he has been calling me and threatening me. He also got all of my information as well as my mom's. He even started stalking her. He used a fake name, so I have no clue who he is, and he has used two different numbers to contact me.

I really want to get a restraining order against him for me as well as my mom, but I need to tell her about it first.

I want to know if it's possible to get a restraining order without all of his information. He is really scaring me and I want to be done with him for good.

anon143860

I live in Ontario and I've looked up how to get a restraining order, and the only thing I can find is that you can't be dating the person but have had to live with them, or have a child with them. I am a 22 year old woman, and have no children.

I met this man last year while attending college. We were dating for the past year, but recently he got very violent with me, and I called the police and even had to be taken to the hospital. He told me if I told the police or anyone what really happened I would "regret" it. I have now falsified a police report in fear for my life.

Having had enough of his bull crap (excuse me for lack of better words), I cut off all ties with him. I changed my phone number and told him to leave me alone.

Now here's the doozy: he's recently gotten a hold of my new phone number, and keeps calling me and text messaging me, but I generally ignore them.

We also have mutual friends, so we're often in the same places, and he still persists and bothers me. He has even gone as far as coming to my house because I will not answer his phone calls or texts. I've told him on numerous occasions not to contact me on my phone, and not to come to my home. But he continues.

I really need some help. There has to be some loophole in this situation. Is there any way I can obtain a restraining order against him without having any children with him, or having lived with him?

anon142145

I have a 15 year old daughter who has been in relationships with boys since age 12 without letting us know. She's not virgin anymore. We found out that she has been going out with the last guy for almost a year.

We told her and her boyfriend that she isn't allowed to continue that relationship, but the guy told me that no matter what I do he will be with her.

Can I get an a restraining order against him? He also came to our house to tell me that if I call the police he will tell them how I rape my daughters (we have three, 19, 17 and her). I didn't do that. He said that she told him that.

anon141905

i got married two years ago and brought my wife to America one year ago. at the first she was very very nice to me, but since she got to n.y., she started fighting with me over every little thing. Two times she has hit me. When i tell her to leave my house, she threatened to call the police on me. She is telling me that i can blame you for so many things, and i have more rights than you. i find out she married me just to get to America. I told her to leave my house. She said she will when she get a ten years Green Card. Otherwise she will send me to jail.

Please, please, anyone tell me what should i do in this case. How can i throw her out of my house and how i can stop her to not get a ten year Green Card.

anon140897

I have a really big problem going on with my daughters dad! We've been separated for almost two years and he's still trying to get back together and gets turned down every time!

He tries to convince me to take him back and acts nice then but as soon as I say no he becomes a horrible person! He gets very aggressive and starts calling me the worst names! He also got to the point where he's teaching my daughter to be mean to me, spit at me and even say I kill mom!

He hasn't hit me yet, but is hurting me emotionally enough to make me even wonder if It would be better to be gone (not alive). He is a good dad and has a great family but has so much hate towards me that takes over his kindness.

I don't want him out of my daughter's life but I really need him to stay away from me and stop the insults! Please help me! I need to stay sane for my daughter and my job.

Annomis

I'm a 15 year old girl and I've had a male stalker for the past three years and he's been harassing me and my school hasn't done anything about it. can I get a TRO?

anon138593

my ex keeps texting me telling me she's going to kill herself over me and keeps trying to make me feel bad about the break up. i just want her out of my life for good. can i get a restraining order against her?

anon138144

I'm a 56 year old man who is permanently disabled (unemployable) via a sleep disorder: insomnia caused by stress or stressful incidents (extreme chronic anxiety). most of the time, however, I'm laid back so people can't tell I'm disabled in any way. I sleep days (6 a.m. to 2 p.m.) and am awake nights. The local police officers in the town that I used to live in began to stop me frequently as I would leave my apartment complex, and I never would get an explanation at first, but as I was 54 years old and crime free and a nice guy, I was beginning to get really angry about it!

Drugs were common in the complex, but no more than most party places so to speak. It was not major at first, but it began to get bad over time.

It got to a point that the last time I was stopped, I was on my way to walmart to finish some christmas shopping, they pulled me over and searched my car. This was two years ago. I was 54 at the time. the officer just literally admitted that they were looking for drugs.

I held my peace and didn't say anything. After that incident, I was followed now and then and "eyed" with suspicion by officers who were working the walmart when I'd be shopping late at night (even though there were usually at least 12 other shoppers there as well at the time). My complex eventually began to turn into a ghetto as section 8 took the place over (government assistance via HUD). It became obvious that the local cops who patrolled my area had a real problem with me – and totally unjustified at that!

I decided to leave all the crap behind and relocate to another city about 23 miles away from the one I was living in, Well, I'm settled in that city, but I'm now seeing the same goings on by the local PD here, as I shop late at night and even sit in the drive through at jack in the box.

I was sitting in the drive-through a couple nights ago at 3 a.m. at the window, waiting for my order, and a local cop pulls in slowly behind me, then passes me and I know from experience, that he was running my plate. He sat up just ahead of me at the driveway, and of course I had to pass right by him to drive out on to the street to go home.

Should I, at this point, contact a lawyer to be in standby? if I had remained in the city I was in, I'm sure that I either would've wound up in jail on a trumped up charge of 'suspicion' by now or at least been harassed every night. I don't understand at all why they're bothering me. I'm a 56 year old man, disabled and now living in a retirement community. I'm clean as a whistle regarding any kind of criminal record as I've never done anything to be put in jail for. My partying days ended in high school in fact. I don't even smoke pot or drink alcohol (In fact, I'm a christian.)

I began to wonder a couple days ago if maybe I was under investigation where I used to live and maybe these local yokels where I live now have discovered it. At this point all kinds of things are going through my mind and I'm a bit scared now.

The city I was living in was about the same size as orange county, california (but I'm in texas) and the city I live in now is approximately, in population between 12, 000 and 13, 000. Like I said: I've never done anything worth going to jail for, so this is really beginning to worry me as well as piss me off at this point.

It's the ultimate harassment when you're a 56 year old man (or 54 even) and a nice guy and mind your own business yet are harassed by the local law! After all, I'm not some 20 something kid who's cruising the streets late at night. I'm a 56 year old retired person who is going somewhere when I'm out in my car that late!

As I said, I need advice. Should I have a lawyer on standby just in case the scenario gets worse? I wish like hell I would just be left alone! I truly can't get over how I'm being harassed like this. It's so absurd that it's overwhelming!

anon136695

i just had my son in october and my ex boyfriend may or may not be his dad. but there was this one incident that happened the weekend before thanksgiving when he got mad and started pulling on me and my son then when my mom told him to stop and calm down he turned on her and tried to choke her and hit her. he also has been threatening me that he is going to take my son, and he isn't all that sane to begin with.

he has a pending court date for dwi, resisting arrest resisting to pull over and abuse towards a police officer. so can i get i restraining order on him for threatening to take my son and pulling on me and my son?

anon136241

I have a problem with my older brother and he constantly messes with me so much and makes me so mad that it makes me want to hurt him really bad. So is it possible to get a restraining order against him?

anon136074

I am 70 years old and not well. I have a lovely home which I enjoy very much. I have very good help here to help me. Thank God I can afford it.

My sons, who live out of state, want me to come there. I'm too sick to travel, but they insist. My attorney and physician told me I do not have to do anything I don't want to do.

One of them told me to call the police if they try to force me to go.

I don't want to get my sons in trouble. What should I do: go to satisfy them and be unhappy, or call the police and stay home and be happy? --agpg

anon135023

I wanted to know how to help a friend out who is being threatened by an ex boyfriend from the past. He got out of jail and found out that she moved on with another guy and now he's threatening her by saying that if he knew who she was going out with then he was going to shoot that person and kill him, and when he was done with the guy he was going to hurt her.

But the thing is, that when she was with him she was older than him and it's stopping her from calling the cops because she doesn't want to get involved.

anon134141

Please i need somebody answer this question. I had a friend for five years. a couple months ago i found out she had often said bad things behind me and after I stopped talking to her i got my window from my car broken and my boyfriend started to get text msgs telling him that I was cheating on him, but it was false.

well, to finish fast, everything started after I stopped talking to her and another friend had the same problem with this same girl. can i get a restriction order? she's so sick and she lies a lot but i don't want to ask first because she uses two different names and i want to make sure this restriction will be effective. Thanks.

anon132717

my friend has just started to be a piece of crap for no reason and it's getting a bit out of hand and he started beating me so i did it to him. we're 12 and i will hurt him bad. so am i old enough to get a restraining order before i hurt him?

strohka

A non-parent adult inserted herself into a family dispute in Virginia. The person confronted two of my sons, who are still minors, and lectured them in a manner that was inappropriate. As a divorced father, I am fearful of this woman and what she may do next with my kids. Is this a matter that would qualify for a restraining order?

anon132319

Here's the short version to my story. My mom does not like this guy that I am into who is also my co-worker whom I've known for almost a year. He's 22 and I'm 17.

I hung out at his house, ended up falling asleep and went home at like 6 a.m. my mom freaked out. Now she wants a restraining order against him if I ever talk to him again.

1) Can she really file a restraining order on him if we are friends who like each other?

2) Once I turn 18 (a couple of more months), and she tries to file a restraining order then will it still be effective or not because I'm of legal age?

Please let me know because I really like this guy and I'm freaking out that he's going to get into trouble.

anon131496

there's a 15 year old who likes my 20 year old son. but my son doesn't want anything to do with her. she keeps talking about him in school and all her little friends are telling him things that she is saying. how can i keep this girl from talking about him before things get out of hands? --confused.

anon130821

I have a problem with a neighbor who lives two houses across the street from my home. I do not have any contact with this woman. We are not friends in my area. She dislikes me because I do not speak to her when I see her in the stores, which is seldom.

Today I was informed by my employer that she came in to speak to my employer about me. She spoke very slandering about me to my employer. My employer did not share this information to me until the end of my work day. I feel that this woman has taken a step into harassment of me on my job. Would getting a restraining order protect me on my job, my home and anywhere I may be? Please respond as soon as possible so that I may seek advice to my next step.

anon129756

my neighbors harass me! they make up reasons to call the cops on me and my family. can i get a restraining order?

anon129722

Can I get a restraining order filed on me when my ex. who is now pregnant broke up with me because of my religious preference and has asked me to stop contacting her and her parents are helping her. All me and my family is doing is politely explaining how we want to be a part of this child's life and experience moments during the pregnancy.

anon129656

My current girlfriend's ex stays in egypt. He was going to fly next year to the u.s. to marry her, but she broke up with him.

now he is hell bent of taking revenge. He is threatening me and her with dire consequences and hacked in to her e-mail account and took all her family's phone numbers. He even called his grandmother saying some nonsense things.

Now after she blocked him, he's threatening he will take revenge and keeps on cussing. Please help me. Can i stop him somehow from harassing my girlfriend?

anon129609

If me and my girlfriend are both 17 years old with no past of any violence or problems, can her parents file a restraining order on me just because they don't want her to see me?

anon129546

there's a bully that's a total psychopath but still 13 years old, but can i have a restraining order on him?

anon128898

i have an ex boyfriend on facebook who will not stop bothering me and another ex boyfriend who is friends with my other ex and the one who is bothering me said he would shoot me with a gun so i don't know what to do and my other one hates me with a passion. i don't know what to do. I'm scared.

anon127227

Can I get a restraining order to prevent my ex from taking my son and running off while we are in the process of filing custody papers?

anon127178

I told this girl that I was going to kiss her on a certain day. She said she was going to get a restraining order against me. I haven't actually done anything yet as she said that. Can she actually get a restraining order if I don't kiss her?

anon125382

I was once friends with this lady. Her kids and mine used to play together. Before things got weird I let her know a house couple houses down from me was for rent. We used to hang out til she got mad at my daughter over not wanting juice. Stupid I know! The way she acted just seemed too odd for me.

I stopped talking to her and that's when things got weird. She would tell people at my kids' school lies about my family like my kids are racist (my daughter was at their sleepover and the kids had a popcorn fight. My daughter threw popcorn at this girl from another country and told her to lighten up because this girl was mad over everything. She was trying to get this girl to join the popcorn fight), she told people my husband came over and yelled at her mother (the only time my husband was over there and it was with my whole family was to work on their car), she would tell kids' parents I won't let their kids play with her kids, and other stuff which is all lies.

Then she has tried to hit me with her bicycle three times. One head on and the other two times was from behind and if I had moved over not even a foot she would have hit me. Instead of going into the street, it's like she is trying to scare me or something.

I've been at the school having a conversation with someone and she'll butt in and start yelling. I have ignored her. I do not talk all to her. The first time she tried to hit me I was on the phone with my mom and I did say that you-know-what just tried to hit me.

This has been going on for six months now with the lies and for about two months with the bike issue. I am in my early 30's and she is in mid 40's. So it's not like we are kids anymore.

I do not know if I should just keep ignoring her and hope nothing happens or should I get a restraining order against her? And how does a restraining order work when she is renting a house two houses down from me and our kids attend the same school? I just need advice on how to handle this situation?

anon125191

I have a question regarding Facebook harassment. I was looking to get a lawyer and see what my options are because I have an ex-husband who harasses me online as well as his sisters.

He has never actually said he was going to hurt me but said something very close to it among other things. I have called the cops before but they laugh me out the door.

What can I do when my ex won't let things go and harasses me online? I also saw him in a club once and his new wife grabbed my face. No one cared to do anything about that either. How do I get someone to listen?

anon124326

I am in college and a married man keeps trying to have a relationship with me. We were friends then things got weird. He shows up unexpectedly to the building i am most of the time because that is my major and try to talk to me.

It freaks me out because he is really strong and I am pretty sure the only thing he has on his mind is sex. I have told him that I don't like him and I can't be with him but he just doesn't get it. what should i do?

rhino

@Malcolm Emmons: The answer is to get a restraining order. This is a very serious issue and if let slide could end very badly. Restraining orders are very common in schools and are easily enforced by the police. It takes the school counselor out of the position of sole authority and makes it illegal for the offender to harass your girlfriend.

rhino

@anon118185: You have the power to make this guy wish he were never born.

The first thing you need to do is get a restraining order. If he calls you again you can report it and the cops will pay him a visit.

You might think about changing your number too. It is really easy and it only costs about $35. Call your service provider. I know you shouldn't have to and it is an inconvenience, but if you really want this guy out of your life then it's the first step to making it harder to get to you.

Another suggestion: don't answer his calls.

Change the status of your Facebook pages to private and make sure he is no longer on your friends list. When you move, tell only those who you must. Anyone who would tell him does not need to know.

Washington is a great state and if you move to eastern Washington the cops have nothing better to do than to throw jerks like this in jail.

rhino

@enough: You need to get out of the situation. File divorce papers and get her out of your life.

You are being abused. No one should ever feel the need to kill them selves. You may be afraid but I'm telling you that you have what it takes to stand up for your self.

She is going to threaten you and she will probably try every trick in the book to get you to stay with her but she is not your problem anymore.

I hope you can find the strength to do what you need to do.

rhino

@help2435 This would definitely be considered harassment.

Harassment is any behavior that is unwelcome and repetitive in nature.

In the united states it is very easy to get a restraining order and very easy to report on violations resulting in swift punishment for the offender.

You sound as though you my be from the UK. I don't know the system there but I believe that you have every right to pursue an order to stop this harassment.

rhino

@jessee25: The answer is yes. You need an adult to help you file. If you are being abused either mentally, physically, sexually or verbally, you should not wait to get a restraining order.

You must seek help from the police or from a school counselor. These things are wrong and you do not deserve them. I pray that you are still OK.

anon122482

I would also like to know that -anon1021. My 15 year old daughter has been harassed at school by some gang members (females) and just yesterday they attacked her when she got off the bus.

anon122154

my parents called the cops on me because i tried to have my truck picked up and sold today, since the frame broke. i am trying to get a restraining order and need to know how i can get one on my family.

i don't understand why this is when the truck is mine. to make long story short, the officer let the guy pick up my truck and now i need to file a restraining order on my family how do i go about it and do it? thanks.

amypollick

@Anon119137: No, you don't need to call the cops. You need to tell *your parents* if you have not. They need to know this is going on. Yeah, yeah, it's your life, your private business, and so forth. And you are their underage daughter living in their house, and I'm assuming they're paying for your cell phone and internet usage. This entitles them to know that a mentally disturbed young man will not stop bothering their daughter. I'm also reasonably sure they love you, are concerned for your safety and do not want you to go through this.

When I was 14, a guy who was also in ninth grade (but should have been in 11th grade) was making sexually explicit comments and threats to me. This was in the Dark Ages before texting and cell phones. No, this jerk did it in class. I didn't threaten him that I was going to call the police. I told my parents. Problem solved. That's their job when you're 14. When allowing you to try to work it out hasn't helped and fighting your own battles isn't working, then they are there to intervene for you and back you up.

Tell your parents. Please, tell your parents.

enough

My wife has become a person who is determined to break me down until I commit suicide. We recently filed for bankruptcy because I lost my job last year. We now have separate bank accounts and she refuses to pay for anything.

I put all my money into paying the bills, even her car, because it is in my name just like everything else. The house and trustee and utilities are all being paid by me. She doesn't do anything around the house and the filth is making me ill.

How can I get her out of the house? I don't have money to pay for a lawyer because she has me paying everything. I barely have enough money for gas to get me to work and to buy food.

anon119137

I'm 14 and a sophomore in high school. My ex boyfriend keeps trying to find ways to talk to me. I honestly think he has emotional problems and is too clingy and obsessive for me to handle. I told him we need to stop talking, and if he keeps trying to I'll call the cops. Since then (about five weeks ago) he's been trying to find ways to talk to me every day.

1. through friends; 2. phone calls; 3. AIM SMS texts; 4. formspring messages.

Honestly, I don't know what the hell to do at this point. Should I call the cops?

anon118500

My boyfriend's ex girlfriend is harassing me. She's called me 20 times today, and she's threatened me that if I ever get close to their daughter, it won't be a good day for me. She said she'd beat me up, but I'm still a little girl (I'm a bit younger than her). Should I file a restraining order?

anon118185

I have an ex boyfriend who hasn't left me alone since our break up a year ago. He's constantly calling me names, texting me, and if I ignore his texts, he would blow up my phone.

He mainly calls me late at night. He's constantly threatening me that he will make my life a living hell if things don't go his way. He's smart enough to tell me that on the phone though. Never texts that to me or leaves it on a voicemail.

He's recently taken on illegal drugs and would be even worse when he's on them. Now, he's wanting to go to washington and that's a big problem because I've been planning on going there myself. He denies that he's going there to follow me but I know that's the reason because he has no business there.

He told me he wanted to go there to grow weed. Which doesn't make sense because it's not even legal. I don't see why he can't go to california. I don't know what to do. I don't even want him in the same state as me.

I'm seriously having a break down. All I wanted was for him to get the hell out of my life. But all this harassment has been going on for a year now. I was planning on moving to washington to start over and get away from him.

I never imagined he would be psycho enough to follow me out of state. Is there any way I can prevent him from going there?

anon117433

my ex boyfriend won't stop ringing, texting, showing up at my house etc. i have made it clear to him we won't be getting back together ever, and since then he tries to threaten every male i talk to, even just as friends.

anon117195

My husband of 19 years is a nightmare. He constantly is accusing me of cheating. He has real highs and real lows. I'm scared of him as he constantly tells me I have to stay "til death do we part".

He gets drunk and starts slapping me around, but is careful not to leave marks. He forced me to stay awake so he can yell at me for how horrible I am and how I had better show him respect (as if he knew what that word means) or he doesn't know what he'll do.

I can't take much more and what's worse is nobody really knows how he is except his mother and she still would throw me to the dogs, and says that I'm the crazy one when I finally react.

We have six children together. He tells me he will make my life hell if I move on. He won't leave.

My question is can I get a restraining order and still remain in my home? I raised the kids, I home school three of them and it's my grandparents home. Why must I leave because he's out of control?

anon115110

I'm having a huge problem with one of my best guy friends. I'm in a lesbian relationship, and both me and my girlfriend had been friends with him before we started going out. He has had a crush on both me and my girlfriend in the past, but has been off and on about how he still feels about us.

Neither of us see anything in him other than friendship (because we're gay). I made it very clear to him that I wasn't interested, whereas my girlfriend tried to go about it with a nicer approach. Despite the numerous times he backed out on her as a friend and called her a deceitful whore, he's been pursuing her more and more.

This past week he tried to get involved in our relationship. My girlfriend and I hit a bit of a rough spot, and he seized his opportunity to jump on things. He said he was going to talk with her and "fix everything" even though I told him to stay out of it because it wasn't any of his business. Needless to say, I think he was thinking he could break us up and get with one of us, and it didn't work. We quickly sorted out relationship problem out and he seemed to just snap.

After that, he became very reckless and smoked marijuana that had been laced with something (most likely meth) with total strangers when he was alone. That just led to a total breakdown and he became very unstable. He supposedly drove off to Arkansas on a "suicide mission" (which is impossible given the time frame from when he left to the time it takes to get there). We immediately did what we could to get in touch with his mother, who instantly blamed us for everything. He had been telling her lies, or just not giving her all the information of what had gone on.

Needless to say, she felt he thought he had more to gain from us than friendship, and didn't understand why he continued to hang around with us. We simply wanted him to get help from a professional, and said we'd do whatever we could to help him. She said if we really cared, we needed to stop being friends with him and talking with him (by the way, this kid is pushing 21-- ridiculous behavior). She also told us that she knows he needs to see someone, and has been trying for years to get him help.

In reality, she's nothing but an enabler and wants more than anything to be his best friend, not his mother. She never tried hard enough to get him help, and now it seems like it's too late. Nevertheless, we agreed not to talk to him anymore.

We went out of our way to change e-mail addresses, pay to change names in online games, remove him as a friend, put his characters on ignore, remove him and his many alternate accounts on facebook, blocked his phone number, etc. Despite all of that, he came to my house demanding to know what was going on. We filled him in on everything, saying he needed help and we were respecting his mother's request. He then wanted to know how he fit into our relationship, and we made it clear that we saw him as a friend, nothing more. Upon hearing that he left.

A few days later, he managed to find my girlfriend through an online game and started harassing her. She would put him on ignore, but he'd just make another character and keep harassing her. She finally said "I'm respecting your mother. I'm sorry," and logged off.

Today he managed to find me as well, and tore loose on me. I refused to say one word to him and kept putting him on ignore, but taking screen shots of everything he said to me. He was very unstable, very angry, and continued to threaten me. I kept putting him on ignore, but he would make new characters again.

After a while, I think he managed to bypass the ignores and there was nothing I could do. I was too afraid to get offline, as I was afraid he'd snap and come over here and try to do something to me, or go after my girlfriend and hurt her.

He is a very disturbed individual, and none of this has come to light until now. I let his mom know that he's been stalking us online, harassing us, making threats, and that if he kept doing it I would look into a restraining order. If he came to my house I would call the police.

He's taking all of his problems out on me and my girlfriend, and not once have we ever acted in any other manner than a friend to him. He's trying to play the victim for his own problems, and keeps saying I'm a bad friend because I won't help him, especially when he needs it.

I feel I've done a lot to help, but he refuses to see that and would much rather try to get under my skin and make me feel like I'm a bad person. It's not going to happen.

Everything seems okay now, but I know he won't get help from a professional. I'm pretty sure he's going through withdrawal as well, so I don't trust his judgment at all with that added to the mix. I can't see him stopping this downward spiral that he's created anytime soon.

I have the screen shots, and I saved his suicidal texts. Would that be more than enough evidence to get a restraining order, and if I did get one would he possibly be forced into getting professional help in the process?

Malcolm Emmons

So my girlfriend has an ex boyfriend who constantly calls her and talks to her at school. Whenever he does this he always verbally harasses her, calling her very hurtful names and saying things that are really hurting her emotionally as well as spitting at/on her.

While they were dating he would do the same and he also would squeeze her wrists really hard and throw her up against walls, along with I'm sure many other things. The damage he's causing is very obvious for friends and family.

The school was notified and things were "dealt with" in their eyes, but it still continues. I think the best bet is for her to get a restraining order against him. Is this a good choice or should something else be done? Either way something has to be done because this needs to end.

anon112497

So I moved into a new home. I get along perfectly fine with the tenant. When i moved back, i didn't notice i moved next door to the person i was trying to get away from. I get along perfectly fine with all my neighbors but that one person. I never did anything to them yet they keep verbally harassing me and my children.

It's gotten bad to the point were they're passing out flyers around the block stating that I'm a bad person who is going to harm people but all those statements are false.

I have a clean record and have many good friends. She keeps making my life a living hell and i have nowhere else to go. What can i do?

anon112221

If anyone can give advice or answer number 77 it would be really helpful. Since posting that, she has damaged my personal property, including a gold necklace and has tried to hack onto my e mail.

I told her that if she were to contact me again, that I would involve the police, but i don't know if i have enough evidence to really push forward. She still posts online that she is with my boyfriend and I'm constantly afraid that she will show up to my boyfriend's house while i am there. What legal matters can i take to ensure this situation won't happen?

zukomoose

So I don't know if i should get a restraining order on my ex boyfriend. he unfortunately raped me some months back. I went to a counselor, and I didn't talk to him for a long time.

Then he randomly started calling me saying his new girlfriend is abusing him. I felt bad and forgave him for raping me. I don't even know why I did this. To forgive him for such a horrible thing he did to me.

His new girlfriend doesn't know any of his previous acts on me, and thinks I'm stalking him and that I want him back. Which, I really don't!

She probably thinks this though because he must have told her, he has been talking to me again.

Now she got upset at me, and is blaming me for doing things that I have not done or want, while he is telling me he is going to commit suicide because of her.

He invited me over his house one day, (He wanted to discuss his verbal abuse by his girlfriend and what he should do.) and said it was OK for me to come over his house early. So I go, and apparently he didn't tell his mother anything, and said I came over on my own accord, because his mom was about to get upset at him that it so early.

He then got in another fight with his girlfriend, and broke up with her.

Then right after he tried to get me in bed, but then I said no.

He got pissed, and told his mom he wanted me to leave. Knowing I wouldn't have had a ride home for 3 hours. Then I stayed because he told me he wanted me to stay, so later I found out that he told his mom one thing and his girlfriend one thing and told me something else, saying that I refused to leave his house.

He lied to them to make himself look good.

His mom now gets involved, and he is telling her I am doing all this stuff to him, because his girlfriend went to his mother saying I was giving her rude comments over the phone. Which it was the complete opposite.

Where that I tried to meet him one of the days and attempted to rape me again.

I don't know what to do.

He is ignoring me now cause I refused, (not that him not talking to me is a bad thing.) but I don't see how its fair that he looks so innocent, while he did all this to me.

I don't even know why i forgave him the first time

I just don't know how it will work because he has his mom and his girlfriend lies about me.

I don't know if it has to go through court then I have no proof but my word, and I didn't take pictures of the bruises and such from his first assault on me.

anon111631

Can I do anything about the woman my husband had an affair with. Am I just going to have to wait it out? who's in my house, following me, riding by the house, making fake profiles on Facebook to try to talk to me. I just want to be done with her. is there really anything I can do about it or am I just going to have to wait it out.

anon110717

I have received death threats from my friend's ex via text. He quickly took it back after I threatened to get the law involved. But she has told me he verbally abuses her and tonight is in his garage with an axe saying he is out for blood. With my texts from him and my texts from her telling me all this info, can I get a restraining order?

anon109276

Me and my wife were separated for five months. We got separated to work things out, and in the meantime her friend Lori hooked her up with some dude, and she was that barrier for me to get back with my wife. by the way, we have a 13 months old daughter, and i will never allow someone else to be my daughter's father but me!

One night when my wife came to pick my daughter at my apartment, i caught her phone and found out that she's seeing someone, so i moved back in the house to live with her. I called her friend Lori and asked her if she knows this guy, and Lori said to me: "i don't know anyone with that name."

So later on i found out that Lori knew the guy and she lied to me! In the meantime i found out that the guy works at the same company as my wife. Now, what I'm asking is: Do I have the right to put a restraining order on Lori (my wife's friend) and also a restraining order against this guy (ex-boyfriend).

As i see it, Lori and this guy are enemies to my relationship with my wife. In other words, Lori is keeping the contact between my wife and the guy. She's trying to break up my family altogether! Do i have rights to file for it? Any suggestions will be appreciated!

anon109115

I am a grandmother to my 19 year old grandson. His parents -- my daughter and her husband-- dropped him at my door April, 2009. They are angry at me because I was defending him from his father's abuse and my daughter did nothing.

They tried to sabotage his graduation in June of 2009, they sabotaged his job at Pizza Hut and now, my daughter is trying to set him against me by telling him lies. He was upset because his mother called him while he was at his aunt's house (son in law's sister) and caused a huge argument between his aunt and his mother. He called me crying and angry telling me that now they are trying to sabotage his relationship with his aunt.

Someone please help me. I ask that someone give me some advice on this matter. When they dropped off my grandson at my door he was 17. They have never helped me with money or anything for his keep. I am disabled and I also work. Can anyone give me some advice? Thank you so much!

anon108717

I am 21 years old and am almost six months pregnant. note that this is my fourth pregnancy and I lost three babies due to being high risk. I go to beauty school with this girl who threatened to beat the baby out of my stomach! can I get a restraining order?

anon108201

i would like to get a restraining order against my sister's mother in law. i babysit for my sister's baby (my niece) and her mother in law resents it. She has been verbally abusing me for several months already, and then one morning she grabbed the baby out of the crib after my sister and her husband left for work.

she was yelling like a lunatic and cursing with the baby in her arms. i walked away and immediately tried to call both my sister and her husband without succeeding. I'm afraid she'd harm the baby and or me one day.

i spoke to a friend who's also a doctor, and she said my sister's mother in law might be psychotic but there's no way of proving it or what happened that morning because i didn't think of calling 911 until way after the event and she would never go see a psychiatrist. Can i still get a restraining order on her?

anon107581

i want to get a restraining order against my mother in law for my family. i have no written or recorded proof that we are threatened by her. can i still get a restraining order?

anon107055

I have a restraining order against my husband. since I've had it, he has broken in my home through the window and put his hands on me twice and the police won't do anything, or Domestic Abuse. what am I supposed to do to put him in jail?

anon106466

Well I am 15, and i was on stickam and got on webcam with my cousin and few other people i didn't know. One guy messaged me and i thought he was attractive and told me he was 16 from california and he told my cousin he was from delaware.

well he threatened me to do sexual things on webcam, i was crying my eyes out. I didn't know he videoed me, until a month later and he got on my facebook as another person and said if you don't get back on webcam i will send this video to all of your friends. and i keep deleting him, and deleting my myspace and put all the privacy things on facebook. he keeps threatening me and I don't know what to do. i can't tell my mom. I'm too scared.

anon104490

#36 anon61349, you will need to disown her first. plus, you're not alone.

anon103317

I am a girl and i am dating another girl. Her mom does not like me and has told her daughter to stay away from me. She said she is going to get a restraining order to keep me from her daughter. I have not caused any physical or mental damage. We have a healthy relationship, and i care deeply about her. Is it possible to get one against me?

anon103292

In addition to my post #119 and response to #120 which I'm thankful for the encouragement.

My issue was about an abusive ex boyfriend who refused to leave my apartment and claimed he was a tenant there since he was getting mail there and lived there for over 30 days.

When I finally got the nerve to call the cops on him, after getting pepper sprayed by him, I was told by the officers that in fact he is considered a tenant in my apartment due to the circumstances and that I would need to file an eviction notice to get him out.

Also for me to hold on to the little bit of belongings he had and not put them out as he could have sued me for any destruction or theft of his belongings.

He, however, could not come back into the apartment since he harassed me and I feel endangered by him and there has been a police report filed on him.

I understand that different states have different laws so my lesson learned should be a warning for the women of NYC.

anon103090

I have a huge group of friends I'm no longer friends with who keep threatening me. On facebook they threaten to come into my job and smash my teeth into the concrete outside. They also talk about bringing body bags, and how they want to destroy me. I was also getting prank phone calls for two months, and I also have 10 saved voicemails saved from one of their friends who repeatedly called me. I had to change my number.

I took pictures and saved all of the threats and filed reports on facebook. They have already come into my job, although they did not bother me, and they keep making threats on facebook. This is a large group of friends.

I also have their usernames because they would also try to IM me. Can I get a restraining order because of all of this? Anyone have any tips? Please, thanks a lot.

anon102469

I am living with my boyfriend and he has decided to evict me because of our constant fighting. I told him I would go before the 60 days of the eviction notice, but he needed to give me time to find a place and get out. He decided to take his children and leave the house until I move out and is now saying that he is going to a lawyer to get a restraining order on me, stating to the courts that I "shoved" his 15 year old son, which never happened.

He may be trying to get his ex wife to get one on me and then move the kids back into the house and kick us out. Can he do this? He doesn't have any proof that his son was shoved. I actually called the police the evening he is saying that it happened and there is nothing on the incident report stating that I touched anyone that evening.

How can I protect myself from this? I am living in his home with my two children. I just want to be able to find a new place in peace and get out asap.

amypollick

@Anon102238: I hope you don't think this guy is a legal tenant because of anything he said to you. You need to check the laws where you live, but if I'm not mistaken, if his name isn't on the lease for the apartment, he has no legal right to be there. Doesn't matter if he's been a house guest and gets his mail there.

I say this because a friend of mine had a guy living with her for over six months. He received mail at her apartment too, but because his name was not on the lease, he was not a legal tenant of the apartment.

Now, here's what you do: make sure of the laws where you live concerning tenancy. If I'm right, and this loser has no legal right to be there, call the county sheriff and have him removed. Chuck his stuff on the front lawn and tell the sheriff you want him *out* and to have a no-trespass order filed on him. Then, ask the landlord to change the locks, even if it's at your expense, in case loser boy had another set made.

After that, go to the police department and get that restraining order. Change your phone number, your e-mails and your cell phone number. Delete your profiles from all social networks. And don't respond to any messages he sends you. Period. Good luck.

anon102238

I have been in a relationship with this guy who has been locked out of his boy's apartment in the middle of winter and if it wasn't for me he would've been homeless. I took him in but told him to pay me. To this day, I haven't seen any rent money from him and now he claims he lives here even though he's been in and out of my apartment due to his verbally abusive and bipolar behavior he's been exhibiting.

In the meantime he also used my address to acquire legal documents and I didn't think much of it. For the last four months he's been verbally abusing me (in person, via text, on social networks), humiliating me in public; caused a public and domestic disturbance, manipulated and intimidated me to take him back in while blaming me for his irresponsible and immature behavior. All this while refusing to leave because he claims my apartment to be his since he gets his mail here and has been living here for over 30 days.

He also threatens to destroy my belongings. I'm afraid to stay in the apartment with him but at the same time to leave my apartment unattended so he can either destroy my belongings or pawn them. I finally managed to gain the strength to break away from this manipulating relationship and living situation since the incidents were reoccurring and getting progressively worse.

I took away my home keys from him and asked him to leave, after which he flipped and sprayed me with pepper spray --in my own home. I called the cops and got a report of harassment with which I need to go to court and file for restraining order.

He knew all along what he was doing by using me for months, using me, my address, everything I own and my naive, good hearted nature to get himself put in a great living situation without paying for it, nor ever planning to do so.

By law, he's considered a tenant here, even though no bill is in his name and he doesn't pay any of them. All he had to do is stay here for over 30 days and receive mail. Women, beware of con artists!

amypollick

@Anon101880: Please contact the National Domestic Violence hotline at 800-799-7233, if you are in the US. They can help you help your sister to get out of this. This is a toll-free call and a free service. Please call them. They can help you.

anon101880

My sister is getting beat up by her boyfriend. I have the temporary custody of her two children and he crashed her car. He has beaten her four times and he keeps looking for her and telling her if she loves him that he will kill her and her kids too, and if she calls the cops he said that he will make sure that she will die.

She is so scared and I'm trying to help her but she said that she does not want to have any more problems. He told her that she needs to get away from her kids and he does not want her near them and if he sees her near her children that he will beat her up so she will not walk again. What can I do to help her?

anon100286

I'm 13 and my mums ex boyfriend keeps texting her, threatening and asking for money when she has just gave him the car (he brought half of it for her).

he keeps sending abusive and threatening texts. please can you tell me how and if she can get a restraining order for him to have no contact with her?

anon97917

I'm only 14 years old. but there is a girl who is always threatening to kill me and have me breathing through a pipe and stuff, and things that are much worse. can i get a restraining order against her, even if her dad is a cop? i really need help!

help2435

I'm not sure if the actions of my ex amount to harassment, and I may just be overreacting, but I wondered if anyone could tell me.

I broke up with him and a month later got with another man. We made attempts at keeping in touch as friends although this was unsuccessful. So I told him to keep away from me in every form as he was constantly trying to sabotage my life and was spreading rumours about my new partner.

He kept away for a while and then came back trying again and stopped. It has now been nine months since I left him but he is still adamant on ringing and texting me and finding ways to contact me through social networking sites, but as my account is fully private he makes a thing of having a go when I comment on any mutual friends' wall.

What actions can I take? I don't just want to go see a solicitor because I have no idea if I'm even right that this is harassment. I'm just worried it may cause more trouble for me doing so.

amypollick

@Anon95833: Please contact the National Domestic Violence hotline at 800-799-7233, if you are in the US. They can help you find ways to get out of this. Please do this for the sake of your daughter, and for your own sake.

anon95833

I am a 20 year old mother of a two year old daughter. i am a mother full time and i work full time and go to school part time. i have been engaged to my daughter's father for the past four years and i pay all the bills, buy the food, and provide clothing and shelter for both my daughter and her father.

he has not worked in almost two years and can't seem to wake up and realize that is what a man should do. when i try (and i have tried and tried for years) to explain to him that i cannot do this myself he gets violent. He hits me constantly and i am talking about abuses me. he puts me down mentally and i just feel like i can't do it anymore.

i have called the police time and time again, I've tried to ask him to leave and he hits me and won't listen to me. i don't know what to do anymore. the cops tell me i should get rid of him but will do nothing to help me with this problem. i feel like i will be going through this forever. please someone, advise me on what i should do.

Help567

i dated a guy for almost a year and a half. i broke up with him because he had cheated on me so many times, during the relationship and he was very controlling and manipulative.

after i broke up with him there were no immediate issues until about two months ago. he has vandalized my parents' cars, he has thrown sauce packets and stuck objects into my dad's gas tank. he sat outside my house, very late the other night for a while in his car.

whenever i run into him in public he stares at me and laughs but i act like i don't acknowledge him and continue. he recently went into my workplace, where i have worked for a year now and asked if he would be able to get a job there. I really hate that he has damaged property that not only belongs to me, but also my parents. It is unfair. I don't want to have to deal with this anymore. Can i get a restraining order against him for these things, and will i have to have evidence?

anon93491

my brother hits me and my step dad shoots at me and it's making me feel suicidal. should i get an order against them?

anon93350

There are these kids that hang around on my grass because they talk to my neighbor and just outside my back garden they keep throwing stones and stuff into my house and have caused mishaps with the police. Nearly every day they are always there, can i get one against them not to hang there because they are causing danger?

lele80

So there's nothing I can do If I have no address for them to be served! That's horrible!

anon91909

my neighbours are a constant nightmare, banging on the walls, leaving rubbish in our drive area, loud shouting from 8 a.m. to 11 p.m., but recently their shed was burned down. Since they cleared the items that were not affected they just found some metal wire, and started clawing our family car. do you think it is a good idea of getting a restraining order?

anon91623

There is this guy I know who won't leave me alone and thinks I have been doing sexual things with a girl that he had sex with years ago.

He thinks I chill with her every day and always asks questions about it. He just called late at night when my family was sleeping, after I specifically told him not to call because people are sleeping.

I was trying to play world of warcraft while this was going on, and it screwed my game all up in 3v3 rated matches. His illness is trying to latch onto me. I need to get away from people like this because I know who I am and he doesn't realize that, because if he did, he would know who I am too, and a restraining order would help.

No matter how many times I have truthfully denied it, he believes what he wants to. I don't like to criticize a person because no one is perfect and I have had my problems in the past but I got better.

anon91541

I have a question. My sister is only 17 and her ex is 21 and they have a kid together but my sister just recently kicked him out of the house because we were moving out of the old house and he decided to go drink instead of helping her move her stuff. So he did leave the house but just today he texted her, saying that he already has someone to help him with the problem of the baby. What is he trying to say with that?

please i want to hear comments. Thanks for reading.

anon90839

My brother has been really vile and nasty and he use to hit me and threaten me and make my life hell and scared me and went schizophrenic and now he is in this place for bit but i don't want anything to do with him. and also i found out my real dad is a peadophile and raped a 14 year old boy and messed with his brother's kids and that's why i was adopted and he wants to know me but i think he sick and horrible and don't want him near me and i was wondering if i could get restraining orders for my brother and dad?

anon90543

I have two daughters and their mom was arrested for robbery and she has just bonded out and I have custodial custody of our children. DCF has been involved and i feel that they would be unsafe and I am not sure that she will not run with the charge since she has to go to court. can I get a restraining order?

anon89658

I have a three year old and I'm 20 years old. I was married to the father of my son but recently got divorced. He has a girlfriend and they have a kid together ass well.

The girl is crazy. She has been arrested for hitting her own mother and she's constantly smoking. She has threatened me and even came to my house trying to fight me while my son was inside with me.

Can i get a restraining order against her for my three year old? Thank you.

anon88246

OK, there is the guy at school he won't stop harassing me. Every day in first period he calls me out in front of the class and makes fun of the way i do my work or how I do something else.

Any time I tell him to stop talking about me or to go away he worsens the situation.

My first period class is SEA a teaching class for high school students. The first time he started calling me out on things was on a day when I was at an elementary school teaching and he came into the classroom and started to complain about how I was teaching and how bad my powerpoint and lesson were.

He has started to get really bad lately, even to the point he is spreading rumors about me and my boyfriend around the school. The teachers nor the principals do anything. Is there any way that I could get a restraining order against him before I do something that will land me in prison?

anon87448

I'm only 14, and I've been going out a lot lately without my parents' permission. Just like last night. I had gone to sleep over at my friend's house without asking my mom.

I didn't ask my dad because he had told me, "you're not my daughter anymore, whatever you do, you and your mom can die together, where ever you go do not ask me. I'm only here to pick you up after school, if you need anything don't ask me." That's what he had said so i never ask him for anything anymore.

What i don't understand is that one day after school, he picked me up and i didn't go to the car because i was going to go hang out and serve detention maybe. He got out of the car and told me to get in the car. i told him i was going to go to detention, but i didn't tell him about the hang out part because he told never to ask him about it.

So then he said. "if you don't get home in thirty minutes I'm going to call the cops on you." I didn't say anything back but in my head i was thinking, "you claim I'm not your daughter anymore so why do i have to ask you anything". I had slept over at my friend's house and didn't get home till late -- around 11-ish!

The next morning my mom told me to get dressed and that we are going to the police station. We had gone and talked to a police officer and my dad was playing smart. My dad thought i was doing drugs and such but i wasn't, and I'm super positive on that! Then at the end of our conversation my dad had said "The next time she's going out, I'm going to hit her legs until she can't walk."

The police said that physical abusing is allowed in the state of wisconsin! I never knew that, but when we left and got into the car my dad said to me, "Did you hear that i told the police officer that I'm going to beat you up until you can't walk anymore and you're going to have to crawl like a worm?" but he also added. "I'm going to beat you up until you die or end up going to the hospital that night." I'm thinking in my head that's not what he said before.

In the past he was abused me and my family members. Not with his hands but with sandals, belts, metal rods, kicking, and more. He always uses threats too, like if you tell the social worker about me beating/hitting you guys then I'll knock out all of your teeth. if you ever go again I'll cut your legs off.

I want to get a restraining order on my dad but i don't know if the judge will approve!

anon86831

i had gotten into a few confrontations with these girls who wanted to hit me because their ex was trying to get with me even though i said no. the third time this happened i was with my friends when one of the girls tried to jump me in school in the cafeteria. because of that i got hurt. am i allowed to file a police report and get a restraining order?

anon86717

i have a two year old daughter. her "father" has not seen her since October and he says he doesn't want anything to do with her. He wants me to sign abandonment papers to get him out of paying for child support, since he is having another kid and can't afford both.

My boyfriend has taken over the role as daddy to her and he knows that. so when i told him no, he said that then he will just start seeing her and explain to her who daddy is. i asked him why he would do that to her if he doesn't want her, and he responded that if he's going to be paying for her, he might as well see her.

when i told him to go ahead and see her, that i never have stopped him and i still wouldn't, he backed out. I still have the texts. Could i get a restraining order against him until we get to go to court?

anon86575

My dad is harassing me, stalking my house, sending me stupid texts. he left me and my family and took off with another woman, bought a apartment in romania and just left us. He did not care for one minute about us.

Now, he's back and living in the same house with my mom and making threats and sending me stupid texts. i want him to stay away from me. i don't want to do anything with him or his family. i no longer want to speak to anyone.

they think I'm crazy because i don't want to talk to them at all.

anon86281

My ex boyfriend recently engaged in intimate activities with me and I found out afterward that he was in a serious relationship. I told him I would tell her, as I was tired of him thinking the world revolved around him. In order to find out who she was, I contacted a mutual friend. In a matter of minutes, I received the following from him:

"I understand you are contacting people on facebook in an attempt to harm me. You should really stop and take a minute and think about what you are doing and whether or not what you are doing is going to be in your or anyone's long term interests. Your anger notwithstanding, this is not healthy for anyone. If you do not immediately stop this I will have to consider getting a restraining order against you as your behavior is malicious and out of control."

I hardly think my behavior is out of control and I am only doing what I told him I would do, although he is a lawyer so this legal response isn't a surprise.

I have enough evidence to counter that he's the one who is more harmful, but I don't know if he has any validity in being able to get a RO. Perhaps I should go get one.

I have thought, though, that perhaps I should get one against him. As he seems so upset at his own actions, he is acting irrational. Thoughts?

anon86275

I dated a girl who got obsessed with me when i told her i didn't want to date her unless she changed from being so crazy. So then she started to give me threats and tell my friends rumors about me and then, when i decided to go out to a party she got a gang of people to try and beat me up for no reason. She still threatens to keep doing this until i die.

anon85563

Okay, here's the problem. I've been dating a guy for almost two years, and his ex would not leave us alone. I was pregnant last year and she threatened to push me down a flight of stairs, and posted on the internet to kill my baby. Not only that, but she has come into my neighborhood to see if my boyfriend was with me or not. And she stalks me on the internet.

Not only that, but she is close friends with my boyfriend's friends, and she told him that she is going to ruin our relationship. Is there any way I can get a restraining order on her? She has made my life hell, and I have witnesses, and doctors who agree with me. Help please.

anon84549

Also cindy 4954, it's best you stay out of the way because you will end up the one getting hurt, not your granddaughter. Trust me, i was like that lad but i gave her death threats about her family.

Best you you not bother because my ex's family got involved and i turned for wires then it ended up as me. no one messes with me so that's how i got really bad.

When a parent steps in, it's the wrong thing to do. All you should do is really encourage your granddaughter, not force her, or say she can't see him. It's basically give her advice. not you can do better. Plus, it takes two to tango, so...

anon84546

I am actually amazed at these comments. Most of these comments are childish. Basically like, if you get a restraining order against someone, can you continue to attend the same school. They would be removed from that school.

Like me. I've got a restraining order on me because i made death threats and harassment. I'm not allowed near their street, if i go i get lifted on the spot and face up to nine and half months so basically, most of these comments are babyish like or I am getting bullied online. they'll get a little talk from the police, then if they do it again they just get a criminal record then they will face a crappy charge.

anon84533

My old best friend's mom is ruining my life. She is always harassing me and spreading rumors about me, just to ruin my life. she is even bringing up my past, calling my mother a druggie and she is telling people how i witnessed my mother die in a car accident. for years now I've tried to forget what happened but she is bringing all the pain back. For the past couple of days all i could do is cry myself to sleep. is this enough to classify as harassment?

anon84316

My ex-boyfriend is stalking me and breaking into my home. i want to love him but what he did was unforgivable.

Last month he broke into my home, he had degraded my privacy and sanctity of it. he relieved himself on my new rug and proceeded to write on my living room wall with his feces. i want this creep out my life but i love him too much to call the police. this wasn't the first time, either, that he broke into my home. the most recent was when he smashed my tv with a chair leg.

I'm scared for my life but honestly love him. i need some help.

anon84261

As I read through the different scenarios that are posted here my heart truly goes out to some of the many people who are seeking answers.

My question is a bit different, I need to obtain a restraining order in order to prevent myself from having to spend time behind bars. My 24 year old son insists on making my otherwise peaceful life a living hell.

I need to find a way to prevent this from happening. He's flushing his life down the toilet and he wants me to witness this catastrophe. I just want him to move on. Is this grounds for an order of protection?

anon84114

My dad has hit me before but he hasn't in a while, after i called the police on him. He always threatens me that he is going to hit me and beat me until i can't move anymore.

I am afraid that one of these in a rage of anger he is actually going to make his threats effective. I don't know what to do. Can i actually file a claim?

anon84080

i still really need the answer to number 77 if anyone can help?

anon83841

i am 17 and the father of my girlfriend's baby keeps harassing us. we want to get a restraining order and child support at the same time. is this possible?

anon83476

My girlfriend (ex as of last night) is a diagnosed bi-polar who is off her meds, combined with out-of-control alcoholism. She has physically attacked most of my kids at one point or another, while drunk, and has claimed (while drunk) that she takes perfect care of the kids when she is drunk.

Last night, I had all I could take. I went to pick her up from a friend's house, and they were at the bar. So I went to the bar (Me and my two year old child) to give her a ride home. I was immediately attacked by her friend (a woman) who started yelling at me, telling me my girlfriend is leaving me, etc. She then grabbed my arm and dug in her fingernails and told me to leave and continued yelling at me.

Because my girlfriend's friend used to work at this bar, I was actually told to leave. I was completely sober.

My girlfriend is not just a danger to my family, but to herself as well. I have headed off so many suicide attempts I can't even count them. I have not called the police in the past because I love her. I still do but after last night I have to do what I have to do to protect my kids.

What can I do? Can I get a restraining order?

anon83180

I'm 13 and my parents are divorced. I hate my dad. He is trying to force me to spend time with him and I don't want to. I don't ever want to speak to him again but he won't leave me alone. Can I get a restraining order against him?

anon82796

my husband was recently awarded custody of my seven year old step-son but the mother has a boyfriend that scares my step-son and no longer wants to see his mom every other weekend if he is there. can we get a restraining order from the boyfriend for the child? the mother will not make the boyfriend go away!

anon81919

I'm 18 years old and this woman is causing my father to drink a lot and always finding ways to take his money, be it saying she can't afford food for her kids or has late car payments, etc., etc, and it's hurting me and my family dearly.

My brother and sister no longer live with me because my dad doesn't have the money to support all four of us because she would seduce him by flirting with him and my dad knows, but he doesn't really know any better and i want her out of our lives.

She's always coming over. She talks straight into my door even when my dad isn't home. They fight a lot I'm worried for me and for my dad's safety. i don't want to live on the street.

i want to place a restraining order on her for either me or my dad so she can't come around here and mess with my family. please tell me if i can go through with this or not.

anon81864

Where do I find the answer to 77. --LMB999

anon81641

I'm 18 years old, and i want to get a restraining order against my boyfriend's ex. She has called me numerous of times from withheld numbers, and has harassed me recently with continuous calls and text messages. This has been going on since August of 2009.

She hasn't sent anything threatening, but has threatened to harm me physically while in a phone conversation. She has caused me a lot of emotional pain and knows where i work. I was so afraid of her showing up there, that I had to take the day off during one of her episodes.

She also knows where my boyfriend lives, and has shown up there before unannounced.

Is this enough to get a restraining order? I live in the Bay area, California

anon81439

I'm a single mother of three kids and my youngest child's father will not leave me alone. i went out the other day and he showed up trying to hit my car and i was standing in front of it and he almost hit me.

is there any way i could get restraining order against him but where he can still see his child because he is a good father. I'm just scared that he will hurt me. Because he got really mad because he gave me the car and he says he gave it to me for the kids, not for me to go out. what can i do? Please help.

anon79858

I have two children ages 17 and 13. Me and my ex husband share joint custody and for the past several years they have lived with him. i found out their step mom is abusive mentally and physically, I am bringing them back to live with me today!

I live in Tn they have been living in W VA. My question is, can I get a restraining order against her so if my ex takes her back she won't be allowed to see my kids? I am so angry and would like to file assault charges on her for pushing my son down, buy don't know which state to file in. I want to stop her from ever having any contact with my daughter and son. Help!

anon79802

My sister is real abusive and she always hits me. My parents take her side always and they never believe me.

if I say a bad word by accident I get grounded for a week, but if she hits me and says she didn't she doesn't get grounded. I am wondering if I can get a restraining order on my sister. She hits me and one day she is going to end up injuring me severely or killing me. so please help me by answering my question.

anon78925

How about if we are attending the same school and in the same class?

amypollick

Anon78274: This is a tough situation, I'll agree. Even though it's not the most pleasant solution by any means, it's time to get the parental units involved. Yours and his. Your parents need to know this person is driving you crazy. His parents need to know his behavior is completely inappropriate.

Getting a restraining order against someone who is mentally challenged would be a tough fight. If you're in the U.S., there would be all sorts of federal red tape. Keeping this individual out of school would be a violation of several federal laws of equal access to educational services. There's also the question of diminished responsibility. It would be a tough row to hoe, that's for sure.

However, if his parents refuse to see there's a problem, your parents could certainly threaten to bring criminal and civil charges against his parents. That's a whole different situation.

A good place to start might be saying *your* civil rights to a public education are being violated because you can't learn in this environment. You mentioned a tutor. Not being nosy, but do you have a learning disability? If you do, then the same federal laws that protect this student protect you as well. You've just got to make the case.

Hopefully, this student's parents will be receptive and will put a stop to the behavior. Good luck.

anon78551

So i have a crazy ex boyfriend and he has been stalking me for five years. He threatened to stab me, followed my mum around town all day, and she was scared.

When i was 14 he told the police that i had kidnapped his sister, even though i was only 14! he keeps getting my phone number even though i keep changing it. he has sat outside my house before, and today he has just texted me, threatening me again, and saying abusive things.

I don't know what to do. I'm 18 and i don't need this for the rest of my life. the thing is I'm only a student and can't really afford a lawyer. is there another way of getting a restraining order?

anon78274

A disabled kid won't leave me alone and he tries to kiss me as well and chase me around school. I could get evidence of him physically offending me but will this really do?

I'm mean, I'm sick of him. I've already told my tutor and he just says to keep away but i can't help that. I'm at my wits' end and I've decided to get a restraining order but will they actually get me one or give him another slap on the wrist and be done with it?

Also i am very outraged about the leeway the mentally disabled are given in public schools because they are treated like babies. At my old school, somebody wouldn't leave me alone and started swearing at me as i told the teacher but guess what? They let him off again and again and again so i just cracked and i hit, i mean proper smacked him, and i get into trouble.

If the disabled are treated and punished the same way others are, they might get better instead of throwing their plates at someone's head and blaming it on them.

anon77889

me and my fiancee moved into a trailer park where this girl keeps harassing us. she told my 13 year old daughter that she wanted to take her and her 11 year old sister away from me because she wanted my fiancee.

now she has gone as far as calling cps and telling them that my fiancee touched my daughter which is totally not true. her brother recently told my fiancee that she would do anything she could to get me and my daughters out of his life so she could have him.

is this a viable reason to get a restraining order against her? She won't leave us alone. what should I do?

anon77477

A man keeps parking outside of my house and just sits in his car for hours. He looks through the windows of my home and examines my vehicle. I'm afraid he is a criminal. I can't get a restraining order against him. I don't even know who he is. I can't call the police because technically he hasn't committed a crime. What do I do?

anon76939

I have been receiving death threats from someone since i dobbed them in for drugs. I'm 14. can i get a restraining order against the person?

anon75747

A man contacted me three weeks ago that I knew in high school. Had not seen or heard from him in over 25-plus years. He seemed nice. At first we clicked. The first day or two we spoke really intensely. Then suddenly he confesses he is an ex-felon and has been convicted of raping a 15 year old when he was 31. He is required to register as a sex offender.

He also sent me naked photos of himself unsolicited. he then said he would like me to be his slave and that he fantasized of tying me to his bed at knife point. I had put his number on block a few days ago and deleted him from my internet accounts.

He contacted me again today, I assume in fear of my reaction, and threatened to place a harassment charge against me if I contact him further. saying it was a felony across state lines. I have not once initiated contact with him and have only responded to him and not even did I respond today when he threatened any response would count as reason for him to get a harassment charge on me.

I don't know what to do or think. This guy is insane and scares me. Should I get a restraining order even though I can't think if he did anything that would allow for such and to be fair, at the first few calls, I did go along with talking openly about some of the sexual fantasies he said on the phone (just talk. We never met or did anything) but that was before I knew anything of his past.

Now I just want him to go away and not cause me any issues legally because he did a year in jail and four months in solitary and I do not think he is stable and seems to want to pull crap on me. He claims he had crush on me back in the day and has never stopped thinking of me.

What do I do? please help. he scares me. I am afraid if I do anything to make him go away, which oddly seems to be what he is claiming he wants me to do, yet I had not contacted him in five days and had no intention of doing so till he recontacted me, I think he will try to get back at me. Thinking he is into mind games and I don't want to get hurt.

Advise please. thank you.

anon75075

Can I get a restraining order against someone who didn't physically harm me? I borrowed money from my friend and I paid her back everything but all of sudden, out of nowhere, she says I owe her an interest fee because I took too long to pay her back.

Now she harasses me all the time. she texts and calls me multiple times every day for months now. And she used to go to where I lived every day and where I worked. I quit that job and moved so she couldn't find me.

I also go to college with her and I took a quarter off so I wouldn't have classes with her anymore. and now she took a quarter off so she could be in classes with me. She also goes over to my family's house and harasses them about me. I would just give her the extra money just so she would leave me alone but I am barely surviving on what I have.

Can I get a restraining order for this? I have changed my phone lately so I don't have all of the messages saved.

anon75028

If I am on probation and someone puts out a restraining order, is that a violation of a restraining order for being on probation?

anon74789

Here's the short version to my story. My mom does not like this guy that I am into who is also my co-worker that I've known for almost a year. He's 22 and I'm 17.

I hung out at his house, ended up falling asleep and went home at like 6 a.m. my mom freaked out. now she wants a restraining order against him if I ever talk to him again.

1) Can she really file a restraining order on him if we are friends who like each other?

2) Once I turn 18 (a couple of more months), and she tries to file a restraining order then will it still be effective or not because I'm of legal age?

Please let me know because I really like this guy and I'm freaking out that he's going to get into trouble.

anon74701

I have a older brother who constantly beats me, threatens me, and bosses me around. He says go do this or I'll beat the crap out of you. He has beaten me in public, and I have witnesses. could i get a restraining order for him to leave our home?

anon73027

If i could add, i have read a lot of the comments on this page and it seems to me that cops are so horrible, a monkey could do a better job. they also walk around like they are so bad. I know a few cops who actually are nice but those guys are the ones that move up and get over 70,000 a year.

anon72864

If I'm 16 and I'm pregnant, and I don't want my parents near my child, can I put a restraining order on them? or do I have to be 18? I know they will not like this. They will kick me out and I'm scared they might try to harm my child. What can I do?

amypollick

Post no. 58: *Yes,* it *is* that serious. This guy has a severe problem, obviously. You need to get your cell phone number changed. I know it's a headache, but you need to do it. I have a feeling you know this is serious, or you wouldn't have posted in such detail. You know he is a threat to you.

Please contact the National Domestic Violence hotline at 800-799-7233. I know this doesn't sound like a domestic violence situation, but they can help you in the process to get that restraining order and also to give you ideas on how to deal with this situation. It is anonymous.

Please take some action in this situation, before it escalates to physical violence.

anon71965

I have a crazy ex boyfriend. He calls constantly, texts me when Ive told him plenty of times to leave me alone. There's been times when he shows up at my house uninvited and even times where he's seen me driving and catches up to me to try to talk to me.

When I'm out he feels the need to watch me and make big scenes. There's also been times when I'll be driving and he sees me so he'll catch up and try to talk to me. And also a few times when I've gotten home, I've seen him going around the block. Or drive up as soon as I get out of my car and start yelling at me.

He's always telling me to answer my phone or he's going to come to my house. I want to get a restraining order against him. But I don't know if it would be able to happen. Do you all think its that serious?

anon70725

I am a single mom. I was chased out of my own home, and off of my land. My own mother is trying to take away my oldest daughter. She has told my relatives that I am abusive and that I have abandoned my daughter for my other kid's father.

Right now I am trying to get her back, and move home with my kids. My own mother will not allow me back onto my own land. I have tried several times to get them to move. The police always said that they can't do anything if they have no place to go.

Is it fair that I am the one who has to leave my house and my belongings so they can stay there? I need advice on how to remove them from my land, which I have legal rights to.

anon68741

I've recently had lots of issues with my ex boyfriend. We were only together three months when I started to pick up on his controlling ways, so I finished it. Needless to say it didn't go down too well.

Touch wood, to this day, he had never raised a fist to me, it was all mental, which is still classed as domestic violence. The police referred me to a Women's Aid charity who arranged solicitors to go forward for an emergency injunction. The injunction has been put in place for a year, and he still breached it, and every time he did I called the police. He has since got a year's probation and community service for breaching the order, and for the initial harassment he has been served with a restraining order for two years (on top of the injunction). It's stressful and challenging, and I felt guilty for having someone arrested, but that's what he wanted me to feel, and he always had a choice -- not my fault he chose the wrong one!

My advice to anyone out there is do yourself a favor and do what your mind tells you. You will question yourself occasionally, you will doubt yourself, but these schizophrenic people and their issues need help (whether they're male or female, I know girls can be just as bad!)

Do some research for a charity who deal with emergency injunctions. This would be your first step; there is normally a company who can offer public funding for any solicitor and court fees, which is based on your income.

You must also write everything down: texts, phone calls, times, numbers, some phones can record conversations and can record voice mails too. I found this very useful!

I have also had problems with social networking sites, so make sure you check your privacy settings and make sure no one can stalk you without you knowing!

One last thing: I chose to keep my mobile number. Lots of friends urged me to change it to stop him from calling, but I went with my gut instinct. I still have the same number, and if I'd have got rid of it, how would I have known that he was breaching the order?

Good luck people!

anon68650

I'd guess about 90 percent of the people who posted on here are under the age of 20 and undisciplined, uneducated, hopeless individuals who feel it necessary to get involved in someone else's business in order to make themselves feel better.

anon68609

I'm 19 years old I have a friend who won't leave me alone. The reason for the restraining order is she has bad connections to people she knows like gangsters and stuff and she acts like one too.

she always gives out my info to people, which I'm not happy about and is constantly 24 hours harassing me by calling every second or texting every second and where i live the cops don't do crap which bothers me. they won't help me with gangster problems and yet they let someone with schizophrenia get the cops on me for something i didn't do.

She assumes stalking and all that so yeah the police are very corrupt where i live so i want to know how can i go about this. thank you.

anon68500

A personal protection order/restraint is obtained as said above, but remember this; It is a paper. If you are under 18, in order to get a ppo/ restraining order, you need an adult to help you file one.

My question out there: I filed a ppo against a man who owns a house where I reside (my mom's ex-fiance). I went to the police station and got an escort to my own residence since I haven't been evicted.

I watched the police officer walk into the home, then 10 minutes later walk out and he didn't serve this man. Is that legal? I mean, come on.

anon68488

I am 11 years old and another student in school keeps harassing and harming me physically and mentally in school. I don't know what to do because he won't leave me alone and has threatened to shoot me and make it look like a suicide. I am scared that he is serious. i would like to know if someone my age can get a restraining order against him.

anon67937

I feel for all of you and wish I had answers for you or even advice. I wish each and everyone of you the very best in your situations.

I was wondering if anyone knows what kind or protection I need. I have a neighbor (who was a friend) who has been slandering my name for over seven months now. I have numerous letters that are notarized of her mouth-running to my other friends.

The other day she was talking smack and I hollered at her and told her to not even say my name in a sentence. I have nothing to do with her. Well, she called the cops five days later and they came over here and told me if I spoke to her went to her house I'd be arrested.

If I walk by and say nothing but she's in the mood she'd make another call and in jail I'd go, no questions asked. Basically, I'm being given no rights! Any advice, anyone?

anon67396

My parents had to recently seek a restraining order against someone and it was much harder to get the restraining order without first having the man responsible for the threats arrested.

My parents knew the man and knew he likely did not mean the threats but they had to take it seriously, since it was my brother's (adopted as an infant) birth father.

My brother is only 13 and my parents had to tell the guy he can't come into the picture until my brother is at least high school age and probably 18. It amazed them how hard it was to get a restraining order without having the man arrested and they knew the guy was not evil and so it was frustrating for them.

They resolved it with a warning of a restraining order and the man has since returned to his home country of Panama. This all happened in 2003 and my brother has since met him.

Are restraining orders always that hard to get? This happened in the state of North Carolina.

jessee25

its me again. i just wanted to say please help me!

jessee25

i am an 11 year old girl and i want a restraining order against my dad. can i get one at my age because i am scared he might hurt me?

anon66756

I'm really scared of my neighbor because he has harmed me plenty of times and harassed me. He calls me obscene names and hurts me. his little brother comes to play hockey with me every day and then he showed up. how can i get a restraining order against him? please help.

anon66755

i have already told my mom, and it has been going on for around three years now but anyway, he just threatened me not even an hour ago and he shot a hockey puck at me.

anon66754

I want to get a restraining order against my 16 year old neighbor. Almost every day he will physically harm me or threaten me, and i am only 12. We will be attending the same school in around two years. Is it still possible for me to get one and how do you get one? please help

amypollick

To the 12 year old in post no. 41: I don't know if a 12 year old can legally request a restraining order. However, your parents *can* get one and you need to tell your parents or another trusted adult *immediately* that this little creep is threatening you.

Don't wait, and don't be embarrassed. There's nothing to be embarrassed about. You need to protect yourself and the little twit who is bothering you needs a serious lesson in how to behave.

Please, please, tell an adult you trust what is going on. Do it for yourself. I've been in a similar situation so I understand how you feel. Don't allow yourself to be harassed like this. Stand up and tell.

anon66136

I am separated from my wife for almost two years and I have had a lot of problems with my wife between insults and threats from her own family member.

Since december i have had my oldest daughter with me. I told her to get me a notarized paper stating that i have custody for her for the rest of the school year, then the girl will be going back with her mother. Since the girl is here it has been another mess with the mother with insults and so forth.

she threatens me with coming back for the girl if i don't do what she always says. Can i put a restraining order on the mom till the time comes for the girl to leave again so i can live in peace?

anon66104

can i get a restraining order on a boy because he keeps trying to threaten me because i don't want to go out with him and I'm 12. Can i get one without moving schools or switching schedules?

anon65998

Can I take out a restraining order on my daughter's boyfriend against her will? He hasn't ever hit her that I know of, but he's an idiot and trying to get her to move out of her home and in with him.

anon65538

can i put a restraining order out on my 17 year old brother? I'm 16. he beats the crap out of me daily. and screams at me.

anon61540

when i was 16 i had a boyfriend and got pregnant but when i was 1 1/2 months along we got into an argument and he hit me so i had a miscarriage.

after that i took him back but the violence continued on and off. he would hit me then apologize and say he loved me and i would take him back. i am now 19 and i'm through!

he keeps making threats to me, saying he's going to kill me and my family or make our life a living hell if i don't marry him next month. what should i do?

i tried getting a restraining order when i was 16 but it wasn't granted to me. my mom doesn't know i still talk to him and i'm scared to tell her too' it's going to be such a disappointment. i need advice.

anon61349

I want one on my mother. she gave me three scars and beat me with a metal pipe. i'm only 11.

anon61131

Feeling your pain #29. Post how that turns out for you. Mine goes to court soon :/

anon60936

i am a 17 year old girl who lives in west virginia and my parents are wanting to get a restraining order on my boyfriend. they don't like him because we have broke up before and he came back and told me he loved me and would do anything to be with me again and that he would never do it again that it hurt him to do it. i don't want a restraining order on him though because he has never done anything wrong.

he has never threatened me nor anything else. they just simply don't like him. what can i do if i don't want a restraining order on him?

anon60738

i want to get a restraining order against my fiance's mother's boyfriend (confusing, i know). he has threatened my safety and my life, as well as my fiance's and his brother's. is this valid reasoning for a restraining order? i'm terrified he'll show up at the wedding with a weapon, and i don't know how else to keep him away.

anon59577

Can I file a restraining order if my baby's grandparents continue to defame my character and threaten to take her from me?

anon58537

Can you file for a restraining order even though there have been no threats made to you, but there are people that the treats have been made to about me? I don't want there to be any chance that these two people can get to me to hurt me, because i know that that is their intention in the near future! any advice would be great!

anon57980

I'm in the same boat as number 15 comment, though the person who barged into my home uninvited, i do not know -- only through my husband's friends. he attacked me and verbally threatened me and my family's life. there are three children under five he trampled to try to get to me and the cops won't take him in or take my side because he swears he was buying drugs from us, which is so ridiculous! But the cops know everything.

Well, anyway i want to feel safe in my own home. I can't because of this guy who wants to hurt my family. Can i get a restraining order? or is it just not worth it because he is going do it soon. I heard he's armed and coming with more people. I'm scared and the cops don't help me.

anon57335

my ex's girlfriend keeps sending me and my boyfriend text messages. last time she told me she was going to kill herself, but even though she's been told to lose our numbers, she still sends messages. what do i do?

anon57138

My ex boyfriends girlfriend keeps calling and leaving threatening messages on my phone. I have been going with this with her for over a year.

I thought by ignoring her, she would tire herself out. But she won't let up. Now it's been over a year and I'm still being harassed. what steps do i need to take to place action for a substantial restraining order?

anon55594

I need advice. You see, my son's ex got an order against him and he has to go to court but it's been both ways. Will the judge in court order her as well to stop and tell her that her friends, parents etc., need to stop as well or do we need to file too, to stop them from calling?

anon52907

can you take a restraining order out against your wife?

anon51109

I am 30 weeks pregnant and the baby’s father has made threats saying that if I ever bring the baby over to see him that he will throw it out the window. Should I get a restraining order or not?

anon51104

Does a restraining order have to be against someone you have been married to or dated? Can it be against someone of the same sex and you haven't dated them?

anon50742

is it illegal for the complainant to violate the restraining order by either serving the papers or contacting the offender?

anon50692

My daughter's cheer coach has been saying untrue things about me and the rest of the cheer coaches. She has been removed from the team and the league. She had been distributing untrue e-mails and even solicited another parent to beat me up. What can I do to protect myself?

anon50662

I'm 17 years old and my parents are wanting to take out a restraining order against my boyfriend. I don't want a restraining order against him because he has done nothing wrong. i was told by my mom that i won't get in any trouble if I also say i want nothing to do with him. is it possible for me to go back on saying that i will say that? how so?

anon49303

i'm illegal in the us. if i go to the police station, would they ask for my legal status. i am very afraid to go to police for this reason. Please help.

anon46684

to sezell, get the hell out of that relationship before you end up dead, girl.

twstr988

I have a 14 year old daughter. I lost contact with her for 10 years. After reuniting within a month her mother sent her to live with me. Just over the last week my daughter has told me she does not want anything to do with her mother. Since she been here her grades in school have gone way up, she a little happier and she's more outgoing. Now her mom is a compulsive liar about everything that comes from her mouth. She lies to my daughter and she mentally abuses my daughter. Her mom has legal custody BUT she sees her every other weekend now for a year. SHe does drugs,drinks and has a abusive boyfriend she lives with mentally abusive towards my daughter. She doesn't want to be around that at all. Her mom has no interest in her school life or anything she is now succeeding in. Before I was around again last summer she was touched by her mom friend in a way that is illegal. Her mother never followed through with any legal things with that. My daughter has explained to me she was left all alone all the time, locked in the basement sometimes, saw her mom mixing a white powder in a bowl her mom said was medicine. Her mom has smoked pot in front of me and offered to me and I walked away saying I don't do that. Her 2 aunts and grandma all take my side on this and think I should look into legal help to get custody. Now my daughter wants to get a restraining order against her mom and her boyfriend. She gets scared to even go there but she is afraid they may take her from my home also. Her mom has also always been a stripper and I have seen the way she is trying to teach my daughter things that a 14 year old should not know yet. There's so much more but that's a good start I think. My question is with her being 14 could she legally determine where she wants to live and get a restraining order against her mom? Also would they take her from here is she is happy here and doing well here? The worst thing would be for her to want to do this and the court put her back at her mothers. What are our legal rights? I do know it would have to be done quickly.Please help me. Thank you very much.

anon45193

I live in Texas, where when i was 19 i was rapped and became pregnant by a 28 year old man, who then disappeared out of my life. I chose to keep the child who is now almost 1, i very recently found out the father of my child is getting out of jail in December after making many threats of taking my child away, is there anyway i can get a restraining order against him before he gets out of jail or do i have to wait until he makes a physical attack or threatened to make a physical attack on me to get it done?

anon44969

my ex boyfriend and i had a messy break up. he has been seen at my work place and home, just sitting in his car at all hours of the night and i also have seen him at my sister's place -- not at the door or anything just driving around the neighborhood. also he has been sending me gifts: flowers, books and cards. no e-mails, no tax or anything, just nice gifts but unwanted. what can i do to stop this?

anon43223

i live in new jersey. can i get a restraining order against someone for other than domestic violence? people walked in my home uninvited, went after my wife and myself. we called police and was told we cannot file for a restraining order because it was not considered domestic violence? is this true?

anon39165

im receaving a text messaging from my ex boyfriend. its like threatening. can i get a restraning order for that?

anon38624

I`m a 16 year old girl who is about to have twins and i need to get an restraining order on my kids' father. he can see the kids but not me?

anon38053

I am a 17 year old woman who is currently staying at the san diego job corps center and i am trying to get a restraining on my mom because she is trying to get me sent to the sacramento job corps. I have had previous issues with my mom regarding the police and cps. I do not want to be sent back home because it is an unhealthy environment. my mom and i do not have a good relationship and i am trying to get a restraining order...what do i do to get a restraining order on my mother???!!

keitharthur

I am going through a mess with my wife she left me with all of the bills and everything. She is still taking my 2 kids around this guy and he is very unstable and i had a few words when i arrived back home. My son was with so i let it go. Can i get a restraining order against him to stay away from the kids?

anon33119

My children live with their mother. She was living with this boyfriend who choked her in front of my kids! They constantly fought and scared the kids. She has moved in and out of his house over the past few years. She finally left him for good in November. She moved back to her mom's house with them and told myself and my wife how he was an alcoholic and all kinds of things about him.

Now 6 months later she says they are getting back together! I have threatened to get a lawyer to take my kids away. Can I file a restraining order on her boyfriend to keep him away from my kids?

leong4747

i have a 14 year old friend who is being abused by her step dad when he gets "angry"! he spanks her on the butt as well and says it's "discipline" when in the first place it's not his child and secondly she is 14 years old! spankings are for babies not teens! Is there a way she can get a restraining order at her age against him? can i help her with it being an adult? Also her mother is disabled and on heavy medication so can't really help the problem. What steps can I take to stop this abuse before I take it into my own hands.

anon30002

My father's a correctional officer and he's a very violent man. He brings his work home with him treating everyone like they are a criminal. He threatens me and is violent. What can I do to have this completely stopped?

anon29389

How far can a restraining order go against a 14 year old girl from another girl on false witness and false accusations?

mrsQupid84

My husband and I are currently living with my 73 year old father-in-law to help him out with the bills due to the fact that he's disabled and can't work. Well my husband's mother also lives here and she's very violent and a major alcoholic. My question is how can I obtain a restraining order against her as my husband and I are moving into our own home very soon due to her violent and alcoholic ways.

sezell

I've been in my relationship for 11 months. The first two months were great but during the third month I found out that my boyfriend was married. I tried to break it off with him but he threatened to put me in the hospital. The fourth month we were together I found out that that wasn't a threat it was a promise. He hit me in my eye so hard I had to go to the eye doctor and found out my cornea had been damaged. I attempted to leave again and ended up on the floor of my bedroom with a bloody nose and sore throat from being chocked. The eighth month I started talking to friends and they all told me to get a restraining order and change your my number. However, im not the type who likes to get the police involved so I didn't think anything of it. But, last night was the final straw. I found out he had been cheating with my friend so I tried to leave, he punched me in my back, choked me twice, and tried to smother me with a pillow until I lost consciousness. How far is enough??? Last night was and now im in the process of retaining a restraining order.

anon11835

Grandparents ... Immediately go and file a restraining order and consider changing schools. These are all forms of abuse, and will only grow worse. Parents must step in and do whatever it takes to protect your granddaughter! If it means taking the daughter to another city, do so. Nothing is more important than immediate, consistent, and steadfast action to protect the victim ... the victim is often too afraid or to beaten down to stand up and run. Get a protective order, then collect her in your arms, be strong and just do whatever and wherever it takes to get her safe, and after she is safe, pursue every means to end the harassment, stalking, abuse and whatever else he might be meting out to her. Get a protection order for yourselves also if you feel he will harm you, this is very important ....

anon9356

If I`m out in the general public, such as a restaurant, how might a restraining order apply?

cindy4954

My granddaughter is pregnant by a young man she met several months ago. At first I thought that the young man had planned to get her pregnant in order to have control over her. Now he is becoming verbally abusive to her and she will not stop talking to him. I know she has to be the one to instigate a restraining order on him, but I'm scared for her. He reminds me of someone who could do harm to someone. He has called my daughter a whore and said that my granddaughter isn't fit to raise his child. But then a few minutes later he will call back saying he loves her and will be there for her. I need to know what I can do legally to keep this guy away from her. She lives with me and is 18 years old. Her mother, (my daughter) died 7 years ago so she has had a rough time. I need some help.

anon1021

If you get a restraining order against someone, can you continue to attend the same school?

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    • A restraining order could be issued in cases of domestic abuse.
      By: Dan Race
      A restraining order could be issued in cases of domestic abuse.
    • If a judge is convinced a restraining order is of immediate need, they can order a temporary issue of restraint.
      By: apops
      If a judge is convinced a restraining order is of immediate need, they can order a temporary issue of restraint.
    • A restraining order may prohibit phone calls between two people.
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      A restraining order may prohibit phone calls between two people.
    • If you feel like you're in imminent danger, it's best to call 911.
      By: JohnKwan
      If you feel like you're in imminent danger, it's best to call 911.
    • Once a temporary restraining order is issued, a court date will be set.
      By: trekandphoto
      Once a temporary restraining order is issued, a court date will be set.