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What is Stranger Danger?

Tricia Christensen
Tricia Christensen
Tricia Christensen
Tricia Christensen

Stranger danger is the overhead concept taught to many children that strangers are inherently dangerous and should not be approached or spoken with because of their potential for harm. This has been a common method used with the good intention of keeping children safe. The phrase “Don’t talk to strangers,” and the many instructions given to children to avoid strangers at all times has come under great criticism by numerous advocates who work to keep kids safe.

Some of the key concepts of stranger danger are often repeated to kids. A few of these include telling children:

  • Don’t talk to strangers who approach you in public
  • Don’t believe strangers who offer rides or solicit help to look for things like “lost puppies.”
  • Don’t get into a car with a stranger reporting the illness of a parent.

The list can go on extensively, and the main point is that children should perceive anyone not known as potentially harmful.

Stranger danger is the concept taught to children that people they don't know could pose harm and should not be approached or spoken with.
Stranger danger is the concept taught to children that people they don't know could pose harm and should not be approached or spoken with.

The trouble is, studies on this issue show that it doesn’t always work, and many kids create a visual picture of a stranger as being somehow ugly or scary. Even if they are taught differently, numerous studies have shown that many children completely ignore stranger danger impulses if a stranger seems friendly enough. Alternately, a child in a perilous situation may fail to ask for help from people because they so fear all people they don’t know. This was the case in 2005, when an eleven-year-old boy who was lost evaded rescuers for four days because he was afraid to speak with strangers.

Those looking to harm children may attempt to play with them or offer them treats, making themselves seen friendly.
Those looking to harm children may attempt to play with them or offer them treats, making themselves seen friendly.

It has been suggested by many critics of stranger danger that this teaching be abandoned in favor of empowering children with other messages. One of these messages would implicitly be that strangers could be a great source of help if a child is lost or in an emergency setting. It’s also argued by organizations like the US National Center for Missing and Exploited Children, that most children may ignore stranger danger in any case because it isn’t the way parents act. Parents are always speaking with strangers: at grocery stores, in line at the movies, at schools, and et cetera. So children do not see stranger danger practiced on a regular basis by their parents or guardians.

Research indicates that many children override their "stranger danger" impulses if the stranger seems sufficiently friendly.
Research indicates that many children override their "stranger danger" impulses if the stranger seems sufficiently friendly.

Many believe some form of middle ground is necessary that helps children understand and avoid situations, which might lead to their harm. This would include learning about scenarios that purportedly are dangerous. However, many, including organizations that attempt to prevent child sexual abuse, have abandoned teaching only stranger danger. This is particularly important since children are often abused by people they know. Thus empowerment strategies that give children a sense of self and feeling they have the right to fight or speak up may be more effective in protecting kids.

Tricia Christensen
Tricia Christensen

Tricia has a Literature degree from Sonoma State University and has been a frequent PublicPeople contributor for many years. She is especially passionate about reading and writing, although her other interests include medicine, art, film, history, politics, ethics, and religion. Tricia lives in Northern California and is currently working on her first novel.

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Tricia Christensen
Tricia Christensen

Tricia has a Literature degree from Sonoma State University and has been a frequent PublicPeople contributor for many years. She is especially passionate about reading and writing, although her other interests include medicine, art, film, history, politics, ethics, and religion. Tricia lives in Northern California and is currently working on her first novel.

Learn more...

Discussion Comments

anon303674

I think this isn't 100 percent true because many kids don't always picture a stranger as ugly or scary. Most kids picture a strange as someone they don't know or have never seen before. Most kids are taught that people in uniform are there to help them, but people can go out and buy these uniforms from anywhere, so to be honest, we don't know who is dangerous to our kids anymore.

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    • Stranger danger is the concept taught to children that people they don't know could pose harm and should not be approached or spoken with.
      By: Naty Strawberry
      Stranger danger is the concept taught to children that people they don't know could pose harm and should not be approached or spoken with.
    • Those looking to harm children may attempt to play with them or offer them treats, making themselves seen friendly.
      By: Ivonne Wierink
      Those looking to harm children may attempt to play with them or offer them treats, making themselves seen friendly.
    • Research indicates that many children override their "stranger danger" impulses if the stranger seems sufficiently friendly.
      By: Karin & Uwe Annas
      Research indicates that many children override their "stranger danger" impulses if the stranger seems sufficiently friendly.