- Written By: Allison Boelcke
- Edited By: Bronwyn Harris
- Last Modified Date: 17 April 2012
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Copyright Protected:
2003-2012 Conjecture Corporation
Financial abuse is a form of mistreatment in which an abuser forcibly controls a victim’s economic means. It can involve stealing money, not allowing a victim to take part in any financial decisions, or preventing a victim from having a job. This form of abuse tends to occur most often in domestic relationships, such as between a husband and wife or an elderly parent and adult child. It can be difficult to recognize because an abuser may purposely select a victim who is vulnerable and unlikely to realize the abuse is taking place or who simply will be too ashamed to report it.
Elder financial abuse involves an abuser targets an elderly person, often a parent or relative, in the hopes of being allowed access to the elderly person’s financial information. The abuser may act as though he or she is simply helping an elderly person manage his or her finances, but instead takes money for him or herself. This may be in the form of convincing an elderly person to sign legal financial documents, such as the deed to a house, over to the abuser or allowing the abuser to change the mailing address on monthly checks so the payments are no longer seen by the elderly person.
People who attempt to control and take money from the elderly may have a variety of motives. Some abusers may find elderly people who are disabled or lonely as easy targets because they may be more likely to accept help and allow others to access their finances. Adult children who financially abuse their elderly parents or relatives may feel they are entitled to the money, especially if they are set to receive inheritances. Others may target their family members as a form of revenge if they have or had a rocky personal relationship.
Financial abuse can also occur in marriages as a means to have all control over a partner in order to make him or her feel hopeless enough to never leave. One partner may not allow the other one to have access to any of the household money or may give him or her a small allowance. The abuser may even confiscate the victim’s own paycheck or other means of personal funds. In some cases, one partner may force the other to quit his or her job or cause disruptions in the workplace to get the victim fired. Another potential instance of financial abuse is when one partner purposely accumulates large amounts of debt using joint checking or credit accounts as a means of revenge.
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anon164192
Post 3 |
I think this is abuse. I am also married to someone who is in control of all the money and the homes we own are in his name. I am trying to get away now and it is very hard because I don't have access to money. I am going to get on my own, even if I have to start all over with my two children. I hope you get away and get on your own. I wish you and your children the best. |
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anon160291
Post 2 |
I feel very sad about your story, I feel sad for you and children. I assume you have (or had) feelings of attachment and love for him strong enough to be able to endure such situation. Maybe it is rude to say, but your partner used you and your feelings all those years. After your description of his behaviour towards you and children, he seems to be very selfish opportunist. You mention "his house." Do you mean the house is on his name only? It seems that everything goes in for his personal advantage here and that things are worse than a financial abuse. I am afraid that with time the situation will not get better because from what he is now, he is not going to transform into a loving, caring and generous man. Many women like you make sacrifices for the well-being of their families and children and the slow process of abuse unfairly takes place very often. But like a soccer game needs two gates to be played, a relationship needs two partners to be involved in every aspect of it especially when you have children. With all my compassion to you, I am asking Lord to help you and give you the strength to pass through this. |
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anon132212
Post 1 |
I have been with my partner for 11 years. i have worked most of the years. he has been building a house for many years, so I and my two children have moved many times to a lot of different addresses. At every address where we lived, I paid for everything and all bills have been in my name at these addresses. the only bills he pays are those in his self build. he has never paid a bill or helped with anything in my name, leaving my name in big debt but his clean. my partner used to give me 50 a week to feed all four of us a week and has put that up to 100 pounds in the last few years which is constantly moaned about. I no longer have a job due to being pregnant. i am made to feel useless for not providing an income. When i express my upset with this situation he takes and means of money from me, leaving me to worry about how to get petrol and food. i do not have any money to leave and feel completely trapped. I am now living in a small unit with him and my children because i can no longer pay the rent on a house so our only option is a unit on the land he is building on. His house is almost finished and i have had not a single piece of input into this house that has taken six years to build. Nothing is in my name and after 11 years, marriage to him, is little more than a swear word because he said i might take his house from him. please, can someone tell me is this abuse? i am now having to do things i should not to get money for me and my kids or we would not have nothing. He has expensive hobbies that often become obsessions and always put them before myself and children he never does anything with us as a family and never does anything that does not benefit him. i am seven months pregnant with his second child and have another child from a previous relationship whom i also raise myself. |
