I have a boyfriend I have been dating for only a few months. Just very recently I felt a vibe from him while around another woman that put my stomach in knots. He was playing into her interests and life and basically charming her in every aspect. He called her baby several times right in front of me and her boyfriend. He was drunk but I feel this is no excuse. At work there are several beautiful women associates whom he talks about quite a bit but I just dismiss it as drama fulfillments in his life. Do I walk away quickly or wait for the screw up I fear is coming? Or will I wake up 2 years down the road to someone who has cheated on me? Any advice? I'm confused because I have fallen for him.

you can do much better. let the dogs have him.

i have a boyfriend whom i have lived with for almost seven years. since we started dating, each year he goes for 2 girls, sleeps with them and dumps them. After dumping the girls, the girls will start fighting with me. he always tells them that we have taken a break in other for him to achieve his goals and when i found out and decided to leave him, he will pretend to kill himself. He will write 1000s of apology letters, including CDs. When i forgive him and started to share a new love again, he will go for the girls again in 3 months time. Can you imagine? a 25 year-old boy going for a girl who is 14 years. Sometimes his girls will fight with me till it reaches the police and courts. Now what should i do?

Should i leave him so that he will go and kill himself? or Do you think he will change?

please help me because i dont know what to do.

and i'm afraid that he may bring me AIDS or disease.

I think some of what we fall in love with when we know a man is no good is the challenge of trying to change him. We hang on to what we wish he would be, which is self destructive. I've allowed a womanizer to step in and out of my life for 14 years. Now I realize he only sees me as a friend and someone for him to have sex with at his convenience. He didn't even try to trick me to think it was love. I tricked myself! Now I realize I wasn't in love with him either. I was in love with trying to get something I knew I couldn't have.

I am currently or should i say i was currently in a situation somewhat similar to this with a 33 year old boy. he has this philosophy of "give them what they want til they learn to except what im going to give" OK at first when i heard him say that i really didn't understand it as it was the beginning of us dating and at that moment it didn't apply to me or us. but now one year later i understand it and feel so stupid cause he told on his self in the beginning i was just blinded by infatuation for him.

basically he is saying is lead them on until we (women) are hooked and after you got them show your true self and by then they will be so mentally emotionally attached that they cant get off the hook. i consider this fishing and the comedian Steve Harvey refers to that in his latest book think like a man act like a lady it is a good read and reference for us women cause he truly adds some light into the male mind and actions.

Through out this year i had grown so attached to, crazy about, love sick, head over heals in love with an illusionist, a womanizer, a user, a liar, a cheater, and a child. I suffered weight lost, hair lost, some financial lost, time self esteem issues, and time wasted.

What these men don't realize is that they damage us good women to where when a good man comes along we are too hurt, damaged, and afraid to even talk with them less give them a chance. and that's where we the good women lose, we lose out on love and life all behind a game that was played with our mind. why would a person do that to another person? and just because they can is not a good reason cause we all could play these childish games and i don't know about any of you reading this but i choose and chose not to. cause it's not right.

wow...and men won't take girls who sleep around seriously. Isn't a womanizer the same thing?--except men get a fancy name like womanizer, tom cat, or player. A woman who behaves in the exact same way gets the label of many derogatory names. I heard my own son say once, "Well, you can't turn a ----- into a housewife." I think the same needs to be said about these womanizer dudes...wow. I just got to know one too, and luckily, I figured him out before it was too late for me. Thank God.

I'm a guy of 21 years. I wonder how women get into relationships without knowing much about him!

But still if you are cheated or being cheated on all you can do is *find another one*!

Even if this doesn't work, just take the time to take care of things. *Time cure everything.*

Even I was hurt by a woman who played bum on me. Life doesn't spare you or me. Huh.. Some challenging time ;)

I am sorry to hear as I recently sort of experienced the same thing. He is a user and still pretty much a drifter and over age 40. It was especially sad to see someone that age mentally and emotionally still about 15. I would like to write a book on it someday! Your loser is self-serving and very selfishness. The initial charm was an act to hide his faults. He may use his past to make you feel sorry for him. I would kick his butt out as he only uses you for a house cleaner, roommate, and mommy. He is immature and lies to you as well as others. Once he lies, you have no trust, therefore no relationship. You cannot have the relationship you want without trust.

I bet you haven't known him very long. You probably were convinced you liked him because he acted charming and seemed sincere at first. Now you want to make him be truthful again-but he never was. Sincerity is not truth-two different things. He is a con-man in addition to a controlling user, immature and totally selfish. If you could just see that he never was the guy you thought-he was only creating an illusion. It is not that he changed, he never was anything special.

Also remember that people don't change overnight. Liars like him get caught, kicked out, which is why they need to have another 'doormat' to go to, like a lost puppy. But a dog is more loyal. It's up to girls to wise up and be women, find out his background, and not be so impulsive to let him live with you. If we all wised up, these losers would have no one to *mooch* off of.

He was never forced to grow up and he still has a lot of maturing to do (at *your* expense.) This guy is not what he pretended to be, and you do not want a liar. I would kick him to the curb. If he plays you for his fool it will only hurt more later. So come to grips with him and find a way to find a decent (female) roommate.

To aussiedreamz:

Time to ask yourself WWDLD. If you ever listened to Dr. Laura on the radio you would have no doubt as to what to do. Believe (and act upon) the part of you that says "leave as he will never change." The part this jerk understands about you is ... "but my heart won't let go." As long as he believes that, he has an ace in the hole.

He's looking to you for "Mommy support" while he runs around sampling all the desserts. He won't let you go because he can have it both ways--his immaturity (with you as his Mommy) *and* his playthings. Believe me, this won't change until *you* let him go. Otherwise you will go on and on and on as being exactly how he described you to his "last one" ... just a housemate.

Think about it ... you *are*!

i have this boyfriend in which i went to highschool with in 2007 and i didn't start dating him until december 11, 2008 and we started actually talking to each other in august and then he started living in orlando florida and one day he asked me for my number when he knew he was going to be coming back here in the city i live in which is milwaukee, wi and that's when i then gave him my home phone number started talking to him a little more then started dating him but now he's been acting strange, change in his voice,and he posted up on his myspace that he was a womanizer so what should i do???

My live in boyfriend of over two years is a womanizer. I love him to bits, he is the best guy I have been with when he is doing the right thing BUT he cannot stop his womanizing ways. I have found numbers and called them finding he has been contacting other women and manipulating them with lies and often either not telling them I exist or simply saying we broke up. I go through so much when this happens and wonder why only to research what a womanizer is to find that it is exactly what he is.

He loves me, I know this, he wants a life with me but he just cannot help himself when it comes to other women. I am left feeling worthless and depressed. I want to be with him, part of me tells me to leave as he will never change but my heart won't let go! No-one can know how I feel when they are not in my shoes.It's not so easy to let someone you really love go.

He was molested as a child, I believe a lot of his pattern has come from this. I feel he needs extensive help but I don't know where to begin. I just know I cannot keep going through the heartbreak of him calling up another woman.The last one he told her I was just a housemate...I was furious when I take care of him and love him like I do, to think he would show me so much disrespect. Help me please, I am totally lost.