What Can Be Done if a Parent Refuses to Pay Child Support?
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Child support is a court mandated payment made by a non-custodial parent to a custodial parent, and it is designed to assist the custodial parent with the costs of raising a child. Many nations around the world have child support laws, because raising a child is believed to be the joint responsibility of the parents, whether or not the parents are still together. It is awarded by the court after the judge has considered factors like the income of the non-custodial parent, along with outstanding expenses borne by both parents. Once the court has ordered child support, the non custodial parent is expected to pay it on a regular basis.
Unfortunately, many parents avoid paying child support, using a variety of justifications. Common excuses for avoiding child support payments include inability to pay, lack of accountability for the money, unwillingness to have the child in the first place, to protest visitation agreements, or a personal conviction that the amount of the award is unfair. The burden of “deadbeat” parents is placed heavily on women, who are more likely to be awarded primary custody, and deadbeat dads are a well understood social phenomenon in most countries. If a non custodial parent feels that an award is unfair, it is his or her responsibility to file a formal claim with the awarding court.
There are a number of options for recovering child support payments from a parent who is shirking on his or her duties. Many parents become frustrated with the process, and turn to a private agency to recover the monies they are owed, but there are legal courses to pursue, most of which are free. The first step is documenting the non-payment with the court that issued the initial child custody order. Employees of the court can work with the parents to try to reach an amicable agreement through mediation, or find the non-custodial parent in contempt of court, which will initiate a legal process to recover the money.
Common methods of extracting child support from dead beat parents include garnishing of wages for a lump sum award, wage withholding for regular monthly payments, seizure of or liens on assets, and interception of tax returns. Failure to pay child support can also result in a fine and jail sentence, although this law is rarely enforced. Child support enforcement can also be carried out across state lines, with the court that awarded the payments requesting assistance from a child support agency in another state.
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29
I think everyone should pay something for their kids but come on. If someone makes 1200 a month and has to pay 500 a month, how the heck do they afford to have a roof over their heads? I think the way they set the child support is stupid. I have three kids and I love them very much and I have to pay my ex child support. Been paying him for over seven years now and never been behind until now. I've been trying to get my kids back for almost two years and I finally went to court and all he can say is he wants more money from me. I offer to pay him 100.00 a week and said no, so I offer 150.00 a week and he still said no. I got stuck paying him 200 a week and you know what he does with it? He gives it to his wife and she takes her kids shopping while my kids don't get anything. Yes I am behind because my business is gone so I had to go back to court to lower it. I have always bought anything that my kids need or want. And still pay him. I have letters from my kids stating that their dad and step mom hits them and the GAL or the Judge didn't say anything. I quit the day we went to the pre trail because I have spent so much money and the GAL was on their side. My ex's lawyer was a Judge. I got screwed in court. My kids hate it over there and they want to live with me. Does anyone know the age that a child can be to say they want to live with the other parent without spending money on a lawyer? - anon51320
28
My son is 10 months old and his father has been ordered to pay $210 per week. Since the order he has not paid one penny at all and his family, including his mother. will not help do anything with my son -- not even call when my son was sick with the flu. My son's father will go a whole week calling me about what I am doing or where I'm at but will never ask about his son. He has told me that he hasn't got over the fact that i left him so he is taking out on his son. he said he knows it's wrong and he's going to change but he hasn't done so yet. We have been in and out of court and now he has a bench warrant out on him for not paying and police have been looking for him but are unable to find him. His sister and I are very close but she doesn't do anything for my son either or even talk some sense into her brother about what he should do. Do you think i should be mad at the sister? The sister also has asked me to drop it and give her brother a chance to do what's right but i don't think i should. What do you think i should do? - anon49186
27
For all your women out there, grow up and understand it takes two people to have sex to create a child, so tough if your baby's father does not want to pay, work. I know many women who bust their butts to support their own and they are living well. It's best to earn your money not to beg. I pay child support and it does not bug me but I pay $500 per month and $220 for insurance because I know it is my job to do that. Most of you women sound like you're giving up on yourselves and crying. you women make me sick. these are why the laws are messed up because women cry when the men leave. I understand it goes both ways but those are people's choices. You know what I say: if the father does not want to be in the child's life then good for the child. the kid does not need them anyway, but pick yourself up and get your butts to work. - anon48494
26
my friend is paying $600 plus 175 in insurance a month in child support when he only makes $1,200 a month. How is he expected to pay rent and support himself and then have money left when he has his kids every two weeks? His ex still bugs him here and there that the kids need clothes and stuff and she screams at him that he does not want to buy them anything even though she recieving the child support. She never worked in her life so she's receiving welfare benefits and $670 a month from SSI since her son has Autism. She repeatedly says she won't work and that he has to support her and the kids. She parties and leaves the kids with friends when she does but the court won't believe him. she's been investigated for neglect twice yet gave him the kids for a month one time and then went to court and said to the judge she missed her kids and the judge just gave them back to her. I just think the guy should pay child support but this woman has used it as revenge against the guy. and they have no choice but to become dead beat dads. - anon46922
25
My daughter is five. Her mom has had custody ever since she was four or five months. She stays in one state and I live in another. the past few months I've been going to visit my daughter and when i get there she (mom) will not answer the phone. she's always making excuses. i drive seven hours to see my daughter and she will not answer the phone. She has not been a good mother to my daughter. she's always putting her responsibilities on someone else. She would rather pass my daughter off to other people than to let me have her. it's not fair to my daughter.
On the top of that she has a younger daughter about four years old, who she gave her to her cousin. I pay child support for mine. she doesn't receive child support for her other daughter. If i didn't keep up with my daughter. no telling who would have her. Since she moved and she's married she won't give me her address. How can I go about filing with the court. she's not following court orders? - chevy06
24
Well, I feel the pain of many of you single parents. My daughters father is in the NFL and he had *never* taken care of her. She will by 9 months in 2 days. He has only seen her 3 times. Once when she was 3.5 weeks old, another time when we got the DNA test, she was 5 months old. And this past July. He makes empty promises. The only thing I can tell mothers to do is file for child abandonment like I am doing now. It's a court process but it is worth it for the child. Be strong! - anon40594
23
I have a 3 year old little girl and the father is supposed to pay $200 a month for her and he is on and off with jobs all the time. He owes all but $2,000 in child support now, he has tried to get costody of her and failed. Do I have to let him see her if he is not paying child suppport? - anon39756
22
ok so i see all these mothers talking about being paid their child support...i am a *paying* father and my son's mom won't let me see him. and i still feel obligated to pay the woman for something i went half on. but then again what about me? i want to be able to enjoy spending time with him. it's court ordered. i wanna see my son! what can i do to make her let me see her since i am not behind in any payments? hell i even got a check one month from the DA for over paying for that month. so what do fathers like myself do?!?!?! - anon37966
20
My ex-husband was orderd by the court to pay $442.50 for 3 kids. He was paying on time until my two older children turned 18. I still have a 15 year old daughter still at home. He has not paid his child support in 10 months. If he does give me something he only gives me $100. He has two other children and him and his girlfriend are not married, but he has health insurance on her and her other kids. I was married to this man for 7 1/2 years and he never had us insured. I am disabled and I have taken care of my children all by self. A little bit of help would be helpful. I am not too sure how to go about him taking care of his responsiblity. - anon35149
19
my ex was ordered to pay 448 and he has not. he is behind. he takes off work for 3 and 4 weeks at a time and he is letting his wife tell him what he needs to do. he has three other kids with his first wife and he sometimes does not pay the support on them at 320 every 2 weeks. - anon33337
17
first of i wanted to comment on the post about mothers being golddiggers and seeking handouts. i for one am a single mother of a toddler and have never received a penny for my child. i have struggled since the day he was born even with his so-called father in his life. i made no big deal about it because i was blessed with a job and was making ends meat. but i have realized as my son has gotten older he is missing out on experiences because i cant afford to send him to school and extra expenses without dipping in my rent money, or other expenses so i filed for child support. not because i'm looking for a hand out, but because i believe his father is obligated to be just as responsible as i am. even if he doesn't want to be present in his life.i want my son to be able to have the same childhood as i did. now he's out taking vacations and more while i'm barely keeping food in my house to feed our child. i think that any man or woman who dodges paying child support or not helping at all are cowards and don't deserve to be called parents. regardless, if u wanted the child or children they are here now and need to be provided for. i think people (especially deadbeats) need to learn how to stop being selfish and think about the innocent life they helped create. - FedUpMom
16
I have found out that is is easier to find a way to take care of your children by yourself then to sit around and complain about some money that you are not receiving.I work as a cna and there are several women that I work with that take care of their own. They own their own homes and drive nice cars and all of that was purchased with hard earned money, not money that you had to track a person down to get. Personally, I hate begging and complaining. That is why I work. - anon29490
15
My wife went to jail for some pretty major contempt issues and had her decision making authority removed. She lost her job while she was in Jail. Now she is blaming me and refusing to pay child support saying she does not have the money. I believe she is not looking for a job to get out of paying. Is she still responsible to pay? If she files for a lowering will I be notified or can she get it lowered without me? As an added she was denied lowering in one court and another refused to hear her case. Just prior to her jail time. - anon24872
14
I have an ex that has a lot of money with her new boyfriend. I am struggling. I pay over the required amount so i can see my son. Now she has moved away and wont let me see my son. So i held off payment till she let me see him. I told her i will give you the money when you let me see my son. So now i have to go to court to see him. As soon as i held payment she got child support involved. I asked her why, as she did not need the money. Her answer was "Who is going to pay for our boat and four wheel drive" The system is purely set up for a woman's vindictive behavior. - anon23919
13
My daughter is 6- years- old and when she was about three I filed for child support and her father was ordered to pay R250.00 per month. Six months later, he decided to quick his job because he said he hated the garnish on his salary slip. With God's grace, that same month- as I would not be able to get the money- I was hired by a big corporation and so I could be able to take care of my little Angel. About a year later he called and told me that he had found a job and that he wanted to help out. When I told him that I pay R1000.00 for her per month (R400-school fees; R300-school transport & R300- welfare at my mother's house). He freaked out and he told me that he could only afford R200. Then I told him to make arrangements with my mother as my daughter lived with her at the time. He never sent a cent to my mom. This year I got married and my husband wants to take all the responsibility, but I feel the biological father should take responsibility because he's going around telling people and once told me that his daughter will go to him when she's old enough and that he will wait for that day. He doesn't care.What do I do? Do I get the courts to force him to pay child support? His family is very fond of her and she feels the same about them. She's more close to his family than her own father. - anon23508
12
i feel sooooo low i need some sort of help my ex doesnt pay a penny for my daughter has now got access to her through the courts even tho he is violent n uses drugs nobody has listened to my concerns. - anon22044
11
I have 2 kids ages 7 and 9 with my ex. About 2 years ago, he was ordered to pay child support through Maintenance Enforcement. He has been behind for most of that time. Maintenance can not track his income due to the fact he has started his own "contracting" company. It is common knowledge around town that he is offering discounts in exchange for cash payment. I have passed all the information I have come across to maintenance and they have not done anything about it. Every time they start their collections, he promises to pay, then either doesn't keep the arrangements or doesn't pay at all. And is without consequence.The last time we were in court was about one year ago. The judge ordered no more court for a year. My ex has *yet* to provide proof of income, and even managed to have the judge lower his support payments based on his word. What can I do? - fedup
10
My daughter's dad and I have dated for 11 years. Our daughter is 5 and he refuses to pay child support. He said he'll be covering college and that will end up costing a lot more. This doesn't seem right to me? - anon16141
9
This article is very informative, but it doesn't address a mother who has to pay child support. My ex wife and i were married less than 3 years and we divorced in 2004. I willingly walked away from the marriage and only wanted 2,000.00 for the home we shared and joint custody of our son. To make a long story short she left me for another man and they begin to use drugs in my old home with my son. When she finally admitted to drug use she released temp custody of our son to me. I went through the court systems and finally received full custody and child support payment. But now she and the man that she used drugs with are now married and expecting a child and she refuses to pay child support claiming that the amount the judge ordered is too much for her to pay. So now I'm stuck with a woman who feels that just because she is a woman and the judge set the amount higher than before she will not pay. She tells me, "I cannot pay and what can you do about it have me locked up." I don't want to have my son's mother locked up but she refuses to pay. I need some help! - anon15641
8
My ex-husband, the father of my child, was ordered to pay $400.00/mth by the courts. He never pays on time and it has become a real problem cause I depend on that money since we are living under the poverty line and he is living the high life with his new wife and children that aren't biologically his. I need advice on what I can do about this situation. He still has control on my life even though we are divorced.
Sincerely frustrated - frustrated
7
i think it's unfair to characterize all moms who are seeking child support from dads (dead beat or otherwise) as gold diggers who do nothing but sit around waiting for a handout. first of all, just because a marriage or relationship is over, it does not mean that the father (or non custodial parent) gets out of helping support their child financially. think about how difficult it must be to be a single parent! bottom line, both parents are still responsible to care for their child, despite the situation with their ex. - bigmetal
6
If this person has not filed for child support for seven years, why now, of course a lump sum looks pretty good, Yes there are some dead beat dad's out there, but not all of them. I am seeing more and more good men who want to be fathers but are not allowed to, and are made to pay dearly. Plus have no access to their children as the mothers are too busy crying wolf and sitting on their butts looking for a free ride. The children are their last priority all they see are dollar figures. - anon8609
1
How do you file for child support?
I have had sole custody of my daughter for 7 years and never filed for chid support. If i file now will we be back paid for the past seven years. We have lived in northern alberta for 12 years. - anon615
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S.E. Smith
Last Modified: 04 November 2009
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