A mentor is a person that one can look up to, usually seen as a trusted counselor or guide. A mentor is usually an older, more experienced individual who helps another in personal or professional development. A mentor relationship is for the benefit of the person being mentored, not for any gain on the part of the mentor. Although a mentor can be sought in a variety of social or professional capacities, perhaps the most common type of mentor is seen in a work environment.

A mentor relationship can begin early in life, such as through the Big Brother and Big Sister programs. In these cases, children are mentored in social and academic settings; usually these mentors are for “at risk” children, but any child can benefit from having a mentor.

Finding a good mentor can be as easy as looking to a boss or a trusted colleague at work or church. Sometimes a mentor can be found through a professional or trade organization. Usually, it is easier to develop a mentor relationship with someone you already know, because you have probably seen that person in action. Think about the people you know and work with and what types of skills or insights they could help you learn. Perhaps you are looking for a mentor with experience in your area of expertise; perhaps you are looking for an older parent to guide you as you raise your young children; perhaps your mentor will be more of a listener as you bounce ideas off him or her about life, work, and personal goals.

When looking for a mentor, consider first what exactly it is you want from a mentoring relationship. Think about your personality style and what type of person will complement and benefit you best. Consider talking to friends and colleagues about their mentors, or ask if they know anyone who might be a good fit for you. Remember that sometimes a mentor might be someone you see and work with every day; keep an open mind and consider every possibility.

Next, think about a mentor from your past, perhaps a teacher or supervisor who was especially helpful to you. Learn to identify the type of person who works best with your goals and needs. Also, have a clear picture of what you want from the mentoring relationship and communicate this clearly to your potential mentor. This will avoid any future confusion on the purpose and expectations of the relationship.

Lastly, be assertive. Sometimes a mentor relationship happens naturally, but usually one must take a deliberate course of action to find a mentor. Don’t be afraid to ask.